A Rebirth
by robbobert
Summary: Nanaki tells a story of death and rebirth. A rendition of the ascent of Nanaki's species and of the world after Meteor. Chapter 6 uploaded 031505. While grasping at the past, we must embrace the future. The world waits for no one.
1. Past and Present

Disclaimer: I don't claim to own Red XIII. Honestly. In fact, I claim I don't own Red XIII.

Part One

1.

It's a frightening thought, I'd say. Imagine being completely alone, without hope. Alone without the hope of ever being anything but alone. The world is a dark place walking through it in this state. It's like being locked alone in a room with no light and remaining there so long that you lose all of your bearings and become completely lost. In this world, the days pass with an amazingly dreary languor. The nights are just that much colder. It feels at times as though the world will open up and swallow you whole, and no one will be the wiser for it.

I speak from experience. I once was alone walking through this world. I had no one but myself. No one to rely on. No one to relate to. A friend once told me that to know complete isolation is to know fear intimately.

Someone tried to help me in my situation once, very long ago, though the way in which he made his attempt was wholly sick and demented. His actions were of such a manner that they negated the goal he strove to reach.

They say "hate" is a strong word. I hated him, but... I only say hate for a lack of a stronger word. And really, he was the only person I ever have truly hated.

I'm sure she felt just as I did. It was demeaning to both of us. He never had the right to use us as he did—as beasts. Unintelligible beasts. I still do, to this very moment, purely and implicitly hate him.

I remember the day she and I met. Though not under the best of circumstances—put simply, we met under horrible circumstances—everything turned out more-or-less alright in the end. It was, in my opinion, on that day that my journey toward fate began.

I remember I was on the elevator pad surrounded by glass walls lined up all around me in a circle, distorting my view of the laboratory beyond. I'd heard of her arrival to the lab from the other specimens near my holding cell, my cell being a cage amidst a room full of cages in which I was kept when not involved in any experiments. I'd also heard from the others some odd ideas as to why she'd been brought to the lab, though I did not believe any of them. In any case, I knew something was happening. I knew I'd see her. But for the moment I felt unconcerned, and so I slept.

In my dreams I saw Cosmo Canyon. Home. I dreamed of myself as a cub during the GI war. I was with my mother. We were fighting, or rather she was fighting, attacking GI warriors, for I was much too small to fight. She was so much larger than me. I saw my father behind me, small in the distance, running away deeper into the canyon toward what, at the time, I did not know. And I was filled with anger. I saw my mother engage several GI's. She took one down, but was stabbed in the back by the others' poison arrows. I, in my anger and what I suppose to have been desperation, leapt out at a GI with his back to me to attack. He turned, saw me, and slashed. Sharp pain hit me for a moment as I was knocked back in the air. And then I felt nothing. I hit the ground, took a limp, awkward bounce off it, and hit again and skidded to a stop on my side. My face burned and was numb. I could move but was paralyzed. I couldn't see from my right eye. My left eye saw, blurred, turned on its side, the form of my mother falling to the ground near me from exhaustion and pain. And then she died, right in front of me.

I snapped to attention abruptly. I was back on the elevator pad. Looking around, I came to fix my gaze on a reflection in the glass, and I looked myself in the face. A scar jagged its way downward. I'd had that dream before. Many times before then, and I've had it many times since. I'd woken up in the company of Grandfather Bugenhagen in the aftermath of the war. He told me about my eye, the best way you can tell a child, I suppose. Grandfather certainly had a way with words, and I admired him for it. He tried to tell me that my mother had gone away to find my father. He didn't realize at the time I'd seen it all. Everything he said to me stung my mind. The reflection looked pallidly back at me from the glass walls.

I sensed something amiss. Listening closely I could hear from the depths of the lab a low-pitched mechanical humming. It continued for about half a minute and was followed by a loud clicking. The elevator pad sprung into motion, giving me a slight start. It moved upward, toward a hole in the ceiling which led to the second floor of the lab. I rose to my feet and waited. I had some idea at the time of what Hojo had in mind for me, and I knew where I was going. I waited to see her.

Still, it was a surprise seeing her. I expected her to be somewhat…different than she was, but I haven't a reason why. She was a pretty girl as far as humans go. I never have held much of a fondness for humans for whatever reason. Perhaps it lies with my memories of the GI tribe and what it did to me and mine. Back then I kept most of my feelings hidden, some even from myself.

I feigned interest in the girl to fool Hojo. Anger began to well up inside me. I hated scaring her as I did, but it was necessary, I suppose. My mind and sight began to wander. Through the glass walls of our container I spotted a distorted Hojo standing nearby and, farther off, a distorted trio of humans, two males and a female. Hojo was arguing with the humans.

Closer to me on the perimeter of the container I faintly could see a pair of vertical cracks in the glass. A door. I kept up my shield of attention toward the girl, but I kept my mind on the door, trying to formulate a way to escape. I was startled when I heard a loud clacking sound against the glass. I glanced out just in time to see one of the trio of humans, a large black man with a massive machine gun in place of his arm, shooting at the glass before a rush of thick yellow smoke exploded downward from the ceiling of the pad, engulfing the girl and me. The thought quickly crossed my mind that the trio of humans was here to rescue the girl. That meant I might be able to escape as well. I let my shield down and waited. Anger had filled me. If I got out, the first thing I would do was to exact my revenge on Hojo.

Excitement and anticipation rose up in me as well, heightening the rage I felt. I flicked my head around trying to see something, anything. The sound of rushing smoke above created a sense of pandemonium and chaos that lit the atmosphere, setting it ablaze. I strained to see anything, but confusion reigned for a long moment. And then through the impregnable yellow wall I heard a click and a whirring and the sound of pressure being released (on a note distinguishable from the smoke above). The door had opened.

The excitement and rage overtook me and blinded my senses. I rushed forth and leapt through the smoke, emerging in the open doorway almost directly in front of Hojo's face.

It's funny... I have what I like to think of as a satisfactory memory. I can remember a good amount of my life with some detail, but I can recall so vividly the look of pure and utter terror in Hojo as he saw me rushing him that, even after all these years, I can still get a good hard laugh thinking about it. He had what they used to call a deer-in-headlights look in him. The way I see it, he thought he was doing the girl and me a favor, and it shocked and staggered him that I would turn on him. Truly a martyr under false pretenses.

I tackled him, digging my claws in as we fell to the floor. We hit and skidded about five feet onto a bridge. I remained atop him and bit into his shirt up at his throat and ripped him around for a moment, emptying my rage upon him.

It was then I heard behind me the elevator pad in motion again. I got off Hojo and turned to see that the girl had been rescued by the humans and that the elevator had gone back down below to load something. I knew what was being loaded. I turned back to Hojo, but he was gone.

A little disinclined and disappointed, I ran over to the humans and said "this is a powerful specimen. I'll help you."

And so began my journey. I befriended those humans as well as a few others in a journey that eventually decided the fate of the world. Not bad for an unintelligible beast. As for the girl, whose name I discovered was Aeris, she became someone I respected deeply, probably more than anyone else the group, and someone with whom I became very close before she was…taken away.

Hojo. That day in the Shin-Ra building's lab I suppose I delivered to him nothing more than a merciful blow, ripping only his shirt and not his throat. I most certainly was maddened to the point that I could have killed him; it would have saved our group a lot of trouble down the road had I done so, but... I suppose that even in that wild state there remained enough thought and pity within me to keep me from administering the fatal bite. But I did hate him so. With a vengeance.

2.

If there is in this universe any one principle that is generally upheld, it is that time brings change. It is a simple principle, but in its simplicity it carries a multitude of complexities.

On the physical level natural forces work. Land is molded. Mountains rise up as the grounds of the world drift and collide, and then disappear with erosion. Oceans rise and fall with the flow of the shifting climate. Evolution takes its course. Also with time change the mental aspects of life. The world around us seems to change itself as we grow. Our maturity determines our outlook on life. And as we mature, so too does the reality of the world we live in. And in the midst of these other forces there even changes a certain nearly imperceptible part of life. One at which no one can grasp and which very few can even comprehend and accept. Of this change no one is ever in control, and rarely ever does it seem to occur as we would like.

In the 500 years since my birth I have seen innumerable changes, both in and around me. Early in my life I lost my parents. On that day I was awakened to the harshness life can bring, and my perception of the world changed. I gained friends in Cloud and the others and lost them in what seemed to me only a heartbeat of time, and the world changed again. And that process has repeated itself several times over. Through a cycle of gain and loss I have grown very mature, and the world has matured with me.

But it's strange. Cosmo Canyon has hardly changed at all from what I remember of it when Grandfather was alive. Most of the plateaus that constituted the canyon's topography remain, but have worn away some around the edges, slightly rounded now. The plateaus that house my home, the Cosmo Canyon village, however, have remained almost completely untouched. Perhaps there are more important matters in the world to worry about.

Midgar is essentially gone. What is left of it has been overrun by an encroaching forest. In fact, most of the eastern continent now lies under the veil of trees, though the mountains running through the continent and the area surrounding the Mythril Mine remain unforested.

But really, it seems almost nothing has stood strong in the path of time, for even the all-powerful human has essentially disappeared from the face of the planet. There still are small tribes of humans scattered widely around the world, but there are no large cities left that I know of. The planet seems much more restful without humans dominating it.

A severe decline in monster population has added to the peaceable environment. The Cosmo and Gongaga Areas are almost completely monster-free these days with exception of the old Mako reactor ruins on the Gongaga coastline. Monsters swarm around that reactor like it's some sort of asylum. The reactor is also home to one of the most dangerous monsters in the world: the Heavy Tank. Over the years it has evolved into a much larger, deadlier, bloodthirsty killing machine. That, coupled with my increasing age, keeps me away from that area at all costs unless I'm with company, and even then I tend to step lightly. In the north, the Northern Crater has healed up, though there still can be found the occasional King Behemoth or Dark Dragon, but they exist as mere shadows of their former selves. The Malboro on the other hand has remained relatively untouched, though it has grown slightly in size.

Even with the humans gone I am not alone in the canyon. I now have a family. I've had my family now for more than 200 years, and I thank the heavens every day that I have them here with me. I am mated to a beautiful female named Malaika. She and I together have had twelve cubs, most of which have had cubs of their own. Only my youngest daughter, Kulu, remains alone. She, although she is my youngest, will be 86 years old this coming year. My baby girl.

Malaika and I, along with our cubs and our cubs' cubs form our clan, the two of us acting as its leaders, or primaries, if our terminology is to be followed. There are many other clans with primaries of their own spread around the world as widely as the remaining humans. Most of the largest clans are headed by members of Malaika's immediate family. My cubs have paired with the cubs of other clans to create lesser sized clans. We all hope to avoid any inbreeding that way. After all, inbreeding can make repopulating an entire species from a population of seven a difficult process.

It seems as though I've known Malaika all my life, and it has been more than 200 years. A long time. But for half my life prior to meeting her, I was alone in the dark. I had no idea what sort of secret lay just out of my sight. It is somewhat angering and embarrassing to know now that which I could not have comprehended in my past.

And it's true. It really does seem like I have known her all my life. It's just as with anything else: when you are alone, it feels as though nothing ever was different, as though darkness and solitude were always right by your side. But when it changes, when the darkness has lifted, that feeling of fear and despair is replaced. Whereas once there had always been that loneliness, there now has always been a company, a family. It was never any other way.


	2. A Falling Star

Part Two

1.

I really can't say anymore when it all began. My life has become a blur before it happened. So then, I will start from where I can remember.

The clouds wisped across the sky above me that day. I remember it was unnaturally cool in the canyon, a crisp cool showing the signs of a cooler winter to come. Winter was, however, more than half a year away. A mildly strong wind blew in from the north, no doubt aiding the abnormally cool air.

That day was a special one to me, though I suppose it's a selfish thing to say it was only special for me. It marked the bicentennial of the defeat of Sephiroth.

I lay outside Grandfather Bugenhagen's observatory resting by myself. I wasn't actually resting, though, so much as I was thinking. I'd been alone all day, just thinking. Cloud was supposed to have come that day to celebrate with me, Cloud being the great, great grandson of the Cloud I met in Hojo's lab so long before. But he hadn't shown up, and so I locked myself on top of the canyon and thought. In those days I did a lot of that sort of thing. Even back then I had more or less left behind my fighting days. There was no longer much need for fighting in my life, except in the case of hunting, so I spent most of my time with thought.

Many images came into my mind that day, but mostly I thought about our group of nine from so long before. I pictured each of their faces, thought about their personalities, and wondered why it was I came to enjoy their company. Each of them, I ultimately decided, was, at heart, a good person. Though they had each had their own downfalls, they all were mature and enlightened in their own ways. There was Barret, prone to violence and less than admirable language. But even with that, he was mature in his outlook on life and his principles. Cloud sometimes was depressive (and other times immature), but even though he didn't much show it, he was a very caring person. And there was Aeris. I always admired her. She was one of the few virtuous humans I could not find a fault in. Only my grandfather held that status before her. I tentatively say I loved her. Not romantically, of course. Despite what Hojo may have thought, I don't believe it would have worked. No, she seemed more like family to me. They all did. I sat alone and remembered them all.

At one point my thoughts moved briefly to Midgar, where our journey together seemed to have begun and ended, and then to Sephiroth. Thinking about him now, it seems he was a curse and a blessing. Obviously, he was a menace, a truly depraved soul who made an attempt on the life of the planet. The thing I have trouble believing but that I can't just ignore is that without Sephiroth I may never have come to know Cloud and the others. In a way Sephiroth is the reason I am where I am today.

These things I thought about on that day, my day. Some time into the afternoon I fell asleep.

I dreamed I stood in some sort of circular room set in the side of a mountain. In front of me was the room's exit, which looked out onto a small lake of blood-red water. A river flowed out from the far side of the lake and rushed silently away down between two mountains moving out to a sea shimmering in the distance. In the portion of blue sky visible between the two mountains, billowing cumulus clouds drifted lazily toward nothing in particular. It was daytime. Examining the room I stood in, I saw the walls were made of some sort of dull blue rock. The entire room was lit by light entering from the outside.

Then there erupted a bright white flash of light, seemingly from everywhere at once, that blinded me momentarily. When I could see again, the exit to the lake had disappeared, replaced by a rock wall, and the room was very dark with the exception of some sort of glowing object set in the wall in front of me. It glowed with a pulsing white light which, when it dimmed, left the room veiled in darkness. I slowly moved toward it. As I reached it, the pulsing stopped and the room fell into darkness.

Another flash startled me. The glowing object was gone, but now the walls shone and shimmered like the ocean I'd seen before, illuminated in a deep cerulean blue. In place of the glowing object there now was a door-like hole in the wall. The walls inside the doorway did not shine, and I could not see anything beyond it.

A last burst of white light eclipsed my sight. The rock walls had returned to their drab blue color, and the hole in the wall was gone. Returned was the exit onto the lake. The sky outside burned in shades of red, orange, and yellow light. The sun was a large half-circle on the horizon over the ocean, cut on its left and right by the two mountain faces. Everything outside was silhouetted against the sun, including the clouds in the sky. It shone directly in at me. Sunset. I squinted to see and blinked involuntarily to stop the assault of the sun on my sight. I could not open my eye again because of the harsh light. But through my shut eyelid I saw a shadow fall over me. I opened my eye and saw a large figure blocking the doorway, blotting out the sun. Some sort of large animal. What kind, I could not tell, as it was completely silhouetted. I could see, however, that it was a quadruped. It stood firmly in front of me, as big and strong as the mountains behind it. On the back of its head stood long hair, like a horse's mane, which blew wildly in a wind that did not exist, set aflame in the burning light.

A moment of disconcerting silence ensued. Breaking the silence with a very deep male voice, it said with noticeable contempt, "We don't want you here."

A strong wind kicked up in my face. I braced myself and dug into the ground with my nails to keep my footing. Just as my nails began to slip, I woke up.

2.

For a split second I panicked. My senses returned to me quickly, and I calmed down. The sun had set in the west, lighting the canyon on fire with shades of burnt ochre and umber. It was warmer now, but the same stern wind blowing in from the north kept it feeling relatively cool.

"What a dream," I said to myself.

I was quiet, trying to remember everything about the dream. And suddenly my ears perked. For a moment I thought I heard something on the wind. A very distant, weak sound high above me. But, listening for a few seconds, I heard nothing. I rose to my feet and walked toward Grandfather's house. The sound came again. It halted me mid-step, poised with my head facing down, listening.

Very faded I heard a sound like a siren. It was a prolonged wailing noise, its tone rising and then falling over a period of about ten seconds, pausing, and beginning again, rising up to the same zenith, hovering there, then falling again into nothing.

I closed my eye and put immense concentration forth to hear it over the sound of the wind in my ears. It sounded like a howling coyote, or a wolf in the Nibel Mountains, or maybe some other animal. Whatever it was, I could detect in it a distinct melancholy undertone giving it a lamenting air.

I listened to the howl for about five minutes. It seemed to get louder, and the wind to get stronger with it. I felt almost as though I were in a trance; I listened to that sound and nothing else, and didn't move. Even the sound of the wind in my ears faded away, becoming nothing more than a minor interference. Up and down, up and down. It was an almost hypnotic sound.

Then it faded one last time and did not rise up again. The northern wind had also stopped. In place now was deafening silence. Everything but the sound of my breathing had dropped off the radar. This new silence troubled me. It felt as though I were being watched. I halfway opened my eye and watched the dirt at my feet motionlessly.

Shattering the silence, a piercing knocking rose up from the ground behind me. I jumped in shock and was petrified. My chest burned from the jolt. The knocking was persistent. I followed the sound with my head to its source. A closed, latched door in the ground vibrated slightly with each knock. I stood staring at the door as though I were looking on some horrible monster emerged from the depths of the ocean for the first time, afraid to move or speak. After a moment the shock and burning feeling subsided, and I moved toward the sound. I paused for a quick second before kicking open the latch on the door. The knocking stopped, and the door flipped open. Down below, at the top of a ladder, stood a man.

"Elder Nanaki, are you alright?" he asked.

I was the village's main elder at that time, and had been for a long while. Really, I guess it was natural I should be an elder. One, I truly was by far the elder of any other person in the canyon, and two, not to insult the other villagers, but I was much more knowledgeable about the the study of planet life than any of them.

"Yes, I'm fine. Why do you ask, Kero?"

Kero was the Cosmo Canyon village guard at the time, standing watch at its entrance steps to keep trespassers out. He had a daughter, Maria, near seven years old, who liked to run around the village helping her father protect the people. She was a sweet little girl who couldn't have harmed a fly if she wanted to, but... I guess you could say it didn't hurt having her protect us.

"It's just that you've been up here alone all day. No one has heard from you in the rest of the canyon. And you don't usually lock this hatch. Plus you didn't answer for so long after I began knocking," Kero said.

"I appreciate and understand your concern, but I assure you, everything is fine." At the moment, I wasn't sure I believed myself. The howling sound echoed through my head. It bothered me for some reason.

"Good to hear. I just came up to tell you that you have a visitor. He is waiting for you in the pub."

"Thank you. Would you please tell him I'll be down in a minute"

"Sure," he said, and climbed down the ladder and left.

I watched him leave, and then turned back around. I stood still, listening. A light wind had picked up again, but nothing could be heard riding on it. After a moment I gave up and went down to the pub to meet my visitor.

3.

It was Cloud. As I entered the pub and saw him my heart rose. It always made me happy to see him. He was in his mid-twenties at that time, and was in the face an exact replica of the original Cloud, right down to the color of his eyes. He had a much different personality than his great great grandfather though. He was much more a scientist than a fighter. In fact, he was a rather poor fighter in any comparison to his ancestor. Still, what he lacked in strength he made up for in his intelligence and mentality. I could hold conversations with him unlike I could with anyone else. Sometimes they seemed more like battles of wits than conversations. We would argue about different aspects of the study of Planet Life, the Lifestream, science, and other such subjects, though we kept it fairly light-hearted. In any case, I saw him as my equal and as a window to my past. I guess I even saw him at times as family, like a brother.

Cloud sat at a table directly in front of the bar, facing me as I entered. We both smiled as we saw each other. I hopped up on a bench across from him and sat down.

"I didn't think you were coming," I said jokingly, though I'd recently believed it.

"Red, you know me. I wouldn't dare miss something like this. I had some business back home that was tying me up."

Cloud had trouble pronouncing 'Nanaki,' so he called me Red instead. Coming from him it was alright, but over the years I'd come to dislike that name, Red XIII, and those who called me by it. And what is it that is so difficult about saying Nanaki anyway? An image of him mutilating my name in his childhood years, enunciating with excruciating effort every facet of 'Naaa Naaak Eee,' cut through my mind like a razor.

"Really," I said and acted surprised. "What kind of business?"

"I've been working on a machine that desalinates large-scale amounts of water for drinking. Nothing too major."

"The drought is still holding, then?"

"Costa del Sol is drying up. It's been almost two years. Our readily available water supply has nearly been depleted."

Cloud had lived in Costa del Sol for most all of his life. It was one of the most populated cities around, and it had been for a long while. Over the past two years a drought had held the city hostage, creating something of a dearth of readily available drinking water. Cloud had pledged to end the problem about a year back, and this desalination system was his solution.

"It's ironic that you should die of thirst living right next to the ocean."

Cloud let out a sarcastic laugh. "Well, with any luck, I'll be able to change that. There's going to be a meeting next week. The city's going to hold a vote on it."

"Hopefully it'll get passed. I mean, why wouldn't they pass it?"

"I don't know. Money issues could strike it down. But we need something good to happen. Costa del Sol is going downhill fast. Tourism is way down again this year. The beaches are almost completely empty with exception of the locals. And no tourism means no income. Some of the buildings and hotels around town are beginning to fall into disuse and to show signs of age, cracks and things, and we don't have the money, people, or materials to fix them." He paused for a moment. "It makes you wonder where all the people have gone..."

I was quick to reassure him. "I'm sure things will pick up next year. Just another slow year."

"Hopefully," he said, and didn't seem very hopeful. "How are things on your side recently?"

A thought popped up in my mind. "Nothing has been happening lately. Today has been... fairly peaceful. I've spent most of my time up on top of the canyon by Grandfather's house. It's been relaxing." I paused. The thought welled up in my head, and I could barely hold it in. "I fell asleep some time in the middle of the afternoon." I couldn't tell him. I shouldn't tell him. "And I had a weird dream." I stopped. I couldn't hold it in.

Cloud sensed my indecision and asked if something was the matter.

I hesitated. "How long were you here before I came down?"

"About ten minutes, maybe a little longer. Why?"

I asked quietly, "Did you hear anything while you were waiting for me?"

He was puzzled. Or maybe he was pretending. "I heard a lot of things. People drinking and talking. They can raise quite a clatter in here sometimes." He motioned around the pub. People talked and laughed. A man noisily dragged supplies behind him into the storage room in the back of the pub.

"No, nothing like that," I responded. "When I woke up from my dream I thought I could hear something in the distance." I heard Cloud sigh. He knew what I was going to say. "It sounded like a howl. Like some sort of animal."

"So what?" Cloud spoke with a tinge of irritation in his voice.

Suddenly I couldn't speak. The breath had been taken out of me. "I... I thought maybe it was... maybe it could have been..."

He reset himself on the bench, leaned forward, and looked me straight in the face. His face was serious but calm, and his green eyes seemed to peer into me. It was slightly odd, how he looked at me.

"Red." He whispered as though he were embarrassed to talk about it louder. "You know as well as I do what I am going to say."

I knew. He would tell me that he appreciated my search for others of my kind. That he could understand why I didn't want to be alone. But he would say that seeing and hearing vague glimpses and sounds of unidentified objects and automatically ascribing them to... I needed more proof than that. He'd said it before and he would say it again.

And this had happened previously. It first began on the centennial of Sephiroth's defeat, 100 years earlier. Most of the group was long gone by then—only Vincent remained, but I never stayed around him. Too morbid. I felt alone then, longing for my past, and the feeling was amplified by the occasion. Around that time I began seeing and hearing things, much like the howling sound. I began to believe they were being caused by others of my kind. It became something of an obsession of mine, attempting to discover what it was I was seeing and hearing. And then it all stopped, in only a year.

Only just recently it had begun again.

"I know," I said to Cloud. "But this time it's different. I actually sat and listened to it for what seemed like five minutes."

Clouded laughed. "Red, it's different every time." He stopped and was serious again.

After a moment of excruciating silence I blurted out "Well, you can't blame me for trying." I was trying to change the subject. I felt foolish now. I should have kept my mouth shut. Cloud saw this and changed his manner of speaking.

"Red, it's one of the hardest things in the world, being alone. I know you need someone you can better relate to than me." I couldn't look at him. "Someone you can love. But don't you think that if these things were what you thought that after 250 years of living here you would have met them at least once? There are some truths to face, Red. It isn't any good to find a mate if it kills you doing so."

I didn't say anything for a moment. I felt like a child. "You're right. Now that I think about it, I'm not quite sure what it was I heard. I mean, I had just woken up, and I guess I was a little groggy." I didn't like that feeling. Childishness was a trait that I loathed. Seeing it in myself embarrassed me; I wanted it to go away. I don't think I was very satisfied with what I said, but Cloud had placed some doubt in my mind.

I watched him closely, trying to read him. He seemed to be satisfied that this part of our conversation had come to a close with his point well-made.

The hesitancy I'd felt dissipated, and we began to talk more freely. It was about an hour before Cloud looked outside.

"Wow, it got dark pretty quickly."

I turned around. Outside the pub night had fallen. The Cosmo Candle shone in the doorway, masking the darkness decently. The sky was black behind the candle, only a few stars visible through its light.

"It sure did," I replied.

"I should probably get going. It's a long trip back home."

"Why don't you stay the night here in the canyon? Make the trip tomorrow when it's light out. By now the monsters are probably out."

There weren't many monsters left, even back then, but the ones that remained around the Gongaga area were relatively powerful. Too powerful for Cloud to handle anyway.

"I'm sure I can handle it."

I wanted Cloud to stay that night. "I've heard rumors of a powerful monster attacking travelers at night."

"Really?" Cloud was smiling.

"I'm not lying. It's true. Several people have gone missing, and some have even turned up dead."

"I guess I'll have to watch out for this 'monster.' ...And just where has it been seen?"

"All over the continent and even across the ocean, but most recently around the old reactor ruins and the Corel area. Rumor has it it's attracted to sources of Mako. They say that it can disguise itself as a person familiar to its victims. The only way to tell the difference between the monster and the person it is mimicking is that the monster has red, glowing eyes."

Cloud found my story interesting and pretended to think for a moment. Finally, he said "I really don't want to impose..."

"Oh, no! It's not a problem." I'd gotten him. "I'll just make a bed for you in Grandfather's house. We can sleep up there tonight."

"Alright then. I guess I'll stay here."

"Great!" I hopped up off the bench and onto the ground. "I'll go up and make you a bed."

Cloud remained seated as I backed up out the door. "Alright then. I guess I'll stay here for a bit," he repeated.

"I'll come get you when it's done," I said and left toward the house.

I was glad to have Cloud stay the night. I needed to have company, and really I wasn't close enough to most of the people living in the canyon to keep a company with them. Perhaps there was a little foresight in my eagerness to have Cloud stay as well. It's quite likely that had he returned to Costa del Sol, I would not have survived the night.

4.

We moved into the house about twenty minutes later. I scratched together a bed comprised mainly of an old sofa and a woven blanket of mine I'd bought on a short trip to Nibelheim about fifty years earlier. I placed the bed on the first floor of the house.

Cloud and I spent most of the night talking, catching up on missed time. He hadn't visited in quite a long while. About midnight he hit the wall and decided to get some sleep. I was not tired as of yet and went up to the third level of the observatory to look at the stars. That had become something of a habit of mine over the years. Even today I can spend hours on end looking up to the night sky. Something about the stars and the universe has always fascinated me. It helps me think. It was nearly three hours before I returned to the first floor where Cloud slept and ducked outside undetected.

The sharp cold of the night bit into me. It seemed to revive my senses, to breathe excitement into me, and I didn't know why. I'd felt cold weather like this before. I stopped walking once outside, took in a deep breath through my nose, and held it. The air burned my nostrils for a short second. The moon stood small and insignificant in the sky, casting a dim pale light on the ground that could scarcely be seen. Down below, the Cosmo Candle flitted and flickered its light all around, and that lit my way. With my exhale came a billowing cloud of vapor, writhing, expanding, and then dissipating into nothing.

I walked away from the house, refreshed, toward the northern edge of the plateau. The moon being so small, the sky was blanketed with stars. I looked out in amazement into the distance at the stars to a point where they disappeared behind the darkened Corel and Nibel mountain ranges.

"Beautiful," I whispered to myself, and sat and then lay down near the plateau's edge.

Over-tiredness set in quickly, and I almost dozed off then and there. Just as I was drowsing off, though, something caught my attention and woke me back up immediately.

In the distance on the face of the darkened mountain a small twinkling white light began trailing its way downward from the sky. It moved lazily to the left for a moment, paused, disappeared shortly, and then reappeared moving to the right, doing so over and over, all the while making its way down the mountain. Like a star feathering its way from the heavens to the ground.

I watched this light with interest as it weaved its way downward until I lost sight of it as it moved below the horizon of the edge of the canyon.

Everything seemed normal again. I still trained my attention in the same direction, but my mind which had been roused by the sight began to settle down. I turned my head back to see if by chance Cloud had woken up and seen this. The darkened house remained quiet. Turning back to the mountains, I checked the sky quickly to make sure no more stars were falling. Maybe I was going crazy, just seeing things.

I lay there for five more minutes before getting up to go back inside out of the cold. It was then the light reappeared, much closer than before. It now was on the ground, moving between two steep cliffs down below just outside of the village. I could see now the light was a white flame. It flickered erratically, caught in some draft of wind, lighting the rocks on either side of it and the ground below it. It also appeared it was being held by something, though it was too dark to say what.

I strained to see through the cold darkness and inched close to the edge of the plateau I was on to get myself as close as possible. The flame moved directly below me, paused momentarily, and then began moving forward again, but more slowly now. I put my front feet on the very edge of the cliff and leaned heavily over them to see downward. A form was silhouetted next to the flame that appeared to be holding it with a rope of some sort. I watched intently.

And then, before I had a chance to react, the land I leaned on fell away and I began to fall over the cliff. Panic shot through my mind like an arrow. I pushed out and up with my hind legs in hopes of jumping and turning in midair and grabbing the ledge to pull myself up again. The attempt was valiant but unsuccessful. I didn't get enough height on my jump, and by the time I had turned, I'd fallen too far. My head hit the edge of the cliff hard, slamming my jaw shut with crushing force. I don't remember much else about my fall. I flipped over after hitting my head and rolled and skidded down the cliffside, hitting sharp rocks on my way down. I hit the ground awkwardly, my hind quarters first and then the rest of me, landing with a loud thud, bouncing back up limply, and falling again to rest.

My mind was frantic, but I couldn't seem to think. What had just happened? It hurt to breathe. I felt a horrible blunt pain in my leg that sent pulses of searing pressure to my head. My mind buzzed loudly as the pain crescendoed, as though I'd run headlong into a wall. I wanted to get up and run away from the pain as quickly as possible, but I couldn't move. The pain radiated from my leg and overwhelmed me.

And then my mind came to rest, as still as my body, lying there in a heap. My sight rested straight ahead. The world, hopelessly out of focus, was received only in soft brown and black splotches, as amorphous, barely distinguishable shapes. On the side of my nose I dimly could see a thin layer of blood wetting down my fur, glistening strangely in the pale light of the moon. From somewhere nearby I heard the sound of pained whining.

Something was moving in front of me, though I could not see it with any clarity. A light moved toward me, swaying smoothly from left to right, like a fairy almost, like an angel. Closer and closer it came, larger and larger, this white light, until it was all I could see. And after a moment it suddenly was gone.

I lay there struggling for each breath, and the world, black sky and brown rocks, dimmed and closed up into darkness.


	3. On the Mend

Part Three

1.

Everyone in the world has something they hold on to. A person, a place, an object, an event. Something that is special to that person's heart. Something that, with its remembrance and importance, brings with it the strength needed to get up in the morning, the energy to move through the day untiringly, never slowing, and the will to go to sleep at night and get up again to start the day anew. It's an endless cycle. Having something to hold on to keeps a person living. Without it, the cycle would end, and it would all be over.

I kept living everyday, but I never knew why. Maybe I held fast to the hope that one day I might not be alone. Maybe I lived every day for the memory of my parents. Maybe I lived for both of those reasons. Or maybe I lived for neither of them. Maybe, even, at one point I stopped living.

I remember when I blacked out, thinking that was it—I was going to die. I certainly experienced the telltale sign of impending death; I saw my life flash before me. I saw my childhood, the GI war, of which I only remember certain parts, and Grandfather on his deathbed. You must go, he said. Maybe someday you'll find your life's mate. Then he was gone, and I saw Midgar and Meteor, the former being destroyed by the latter, and then there was Midgar one hundred years later, derelict and covered in foliage, becoming a part of nature. I saw myself sitting alone atop Cosmo Canyon celebrating the centennial of the city's fall. Another hundred years passed and I saw myself fall over the cliff, tumbling end over end, slamming hard against sharp rocks on the way, and plummeting violently to rest below. Two-and-a-half centuries passed before me in less than a split second.

The darkness came again, and I saw myself floating in it. This was not a memory. It was more than that. Darkness spread in every direction as far as I could see. There was no sky, no ground. Only darkness. I couldn't move, and so I hung motionlessly in the air. I could feel some unseen force pulling on me both from the front and the back. It felt like I was being pulled apart, but I didn't move in either direction. A beacon of light appeared in front of me, a bright white light in the dark void. Within it there appeared to be two silhouetted figures, side by side. My parents. I could see them clearly as soon as I realized who they were. They stood in the air in the distance at the center of the light, facing me. I wanted to make my way over to them, to be with them. But no matter how hard I tried, I could not get any nearer. They stayed in their spots as well, like statues, frozen in body and mind. Hollow statues. I stopped my struggles to get to my parents. There was some sort of barrier between us, invisible, but halting nonetheless. For a long moment I quietly watched them, and they watched me. And then, slowly at first, almost imperceptibly, but with gradually increasing speed I began to move backward. I was pulled back, away from my parents, into the darkness. The light faded and disappeared from view, and I once again was surrounded. Darkness overcame me, and I fell into deep shadow, fading back into the black void.

2.

I woke up in a sweat with a start, not quite sure of where I was at first. My body was tinged with many different aches and pains, and my head churned. I immediately attempted to get to my feet. Excruciating pain shot up through one of my back legs, and I collapsed in agony into a panting heap. The world spun out of control for a moment before I could see the room I was in with any clarity. I recognized it as the back room of the canyon's pub, the storage room.

The room was lit by several candles placed sporadically about, though much of it, left untouched by the weak light, sank away from visibility. A door hung partially open at the room's entrance, casting a column of sharp light in on my face from the outside.

I lay on a makeshift bed composed of a feather stuffed mat and several pillows. My hind left leg was cast in a white fabric, and I had several surgical stitches on the left side of my face below my eye. My chest was wrapped in the same white fabric as my leg, restricting my panting breaths. Each breath burned a tooth in my mouth. My body was covered in cuts and scrapes.

"I'm alive anyway," I whispered to myself.

Through the cracked doorway came the voices of two people talking quietly in the pub. I recognized one of the voices as belonging to Kero, the other belonging to Cloud. It was deathly quiet in the storage room.

I thought silently about many questions. How had I survived? How did I get to the pub? I apparently had broken my leg, but how badly? What time was it? What day was it? I wanted to call out and ask someone.

Quickly, I answered some of my own questions. I figured it must have been Cloud who found me and brought me back to the village. Suddenly I didn't want anyone to know I was awake. I didn't want to face him. He'd almost predicted this, and I'd not heeded the warning. It was wholly embarrassing, even without Cloud's presence in the room. But I knew eventually I must see him. It was a dreadful thing, that feeling. Like a child who has done something bad, and is hiding from his parents.

Already exhausted from my effort to stand, I soon fell back asleep. When I awoke some time later, a young girl stood in the doorway. It was Maria, Kero's daughter. She stood in a blue, flowered dress with her hands behind her back, watching me.

"Hello, Mr. Nanaki," she said with sudden excitement. She had the strange habit of always calling me Mr. It was a bit uncomfortable...

I lifted my head to her. She waved cutely at me and then without warning ran up and hugged me around the head. The force with which she ran into me knocked me back onto my side on the bed, and she fell on top of me. Pain erupted through my body, but I suppressed it. After a long moment she got up off of me. Maybe she sensed she'd hurt me. Or maybe she merely had finished hugging me. In any case, she was up.

"Everyone was really worried about you," she said. "But I knew you would be okay."

I smiled. "What time is it right now, Maria?"

"It's nighttime. I'm supposed to be in bed right now." She had a mischievous grin on her face, and let out a subdued giggle.

I laughed with her. "Bad girl." I paused and then continued. "How long have I been asleep?"

She thought for a moment. "About... six days, I think. I can't remember."

Six days... "Hmm... Do you know if Cloud is still here? Or has he gone back home?" I couldn't believe it. I'd just triggered the confrontation I was afraid of.

"I think I saw him in the other room. Do you want me to go check?"

"If you could, that would be great." I smiled lightly. The words just kept slipping.

"Okay." She walked back to the threshold of the room and turned. "I knew you'd wake up, Mr. Nanaki."

"Thanks." I felt like I'd thanked her for something she hadn't said.

Maria scampered off with a smile, leaving the door wide open. I dreaded what was to come. Restlessness set in. I tried to resettle on my mat, but my leg was in too much pain to move. I only succeeded in making myself more uncomfortable.

It took an eternity for Cloud to come. When he came into the doorway, he stopped. Light from the hall outside poured in around him.

"How are you?" he asked.

I picked up a hint of exhaustion and maybe anger in his voice. He spoke in one level of inflection, a tired, relaxed one which made me all the more uncomfortable.

"Good." My voice sounded hoarsely. I cleared my throat and tried again. "Good." Better.

"Everyone was worried. We didn't think you were going to make it. You've been in and out of consciousness for a week. You had a pretty bad fever. An infection, maybe, in your leg. If I hadn't found you so quickly that night you may have died."

"I guess I'm lucky you were here."

"You're lucky you fall so loudly. You're lucky that you still had the presence of mind after you fell to howl out in hopes someone would hear you. If not for the howling I may not have come out and found you."

Howling? I howled? A grand pause in the conversation began and ended.

I began again. "...So what all did I break and bruise?"

"It was a pretty bad fall. I likely shouldn't have moved you after I found you for fear of exacerbating you injuries, but it looks like it turned out all right."

I listened patiently.

He continued. "I got the best doctor I could find from Costa del Sol down here to fix you up. It was almost three days before he got here, but all of the surgery was done quickly after that. He said you broke your left rear leg in two places and that you had two broken ribs and several bruised ones along with a sizable concussion."

"Pretty bad."

"I'm not done yet, though those were the major injuries." I wanted him to be done. "The doctor gave you a pretty thorough examination. He found that you broke a tooth. Also he found a cracked nail on the foot of your broken leg."

I felt around in my mouth for the broken tooth. My left canine had snapped right at the tip. Sharp pain streaked through my mouth as I touched it, eliciting from me a slight wince. I looked at my foot. It was cast, shielded from view.

"He cut it right off. The broken part of your nail, I mean. Not your foot. Let's see... You had a pretty deep laceration below your eye. An inch or two up, and you'd have lost the rest of your sight. You also broke your nose. Just barely though. You only chipped some bone off."

He seemed intent on torturing me with every last detail of my injuries. And I suppose he had done so because he had finished talking and left that deathly silence to retake the room.

After a moment Cloud left the doorway and walked into the room.

"What happened? How could something like this happen?" he asked with concern.

He didn't know, then. What I thought I'd seen. I wanted to lie. Maybe to say I was sleepwalking, or that I was out for a walk and someone pushed me over, or even that I just fell, but none of it seemed plausible. And so, with no small amount of courage, I spoke up.

"I was outside enjoying the night a bit before going to sleep, and... well... I thought I saw something."

He knew now. An irritated, tired sigh escaped from him, but no other sign showed in him.

"I was looking at the stars, and I saw one start to fall down in front of the mountains north of here. It went down over the horizon, and I thought it was gone, but then I saw it again on the ground directly below me. I tried to get closer, and... the ground couldn't hold me."

Cloud wasn't looking at me now, but past me into the ground. He nodded to himself. I waited and prepared for whatever he might say. The child had been found by his parents.

But when he spoke, it was softly, almost sleepily. "You know what I'm going to say, so I won't waste my time. My point was made last week on that cliff." He still looked at the floor. "It's no good getting what you want if you die trying." He looked at me. "You know what I mean now."

"...Yes." And I did. What Cloud had just said and what he'd said that night a week earlier had been made painfully clear to me. "You're right," I said. "I've been obsessed. I see now you're right."

"I hope that's true. ...It seems like we've had this conversation before, huh?"

I nodded.

Cloud began down a different avenue. "So how do you feel?"

As if on cue, the world spun around and pulsed in pain for a moment. "I have a monstrous headache."

"Understandable."

"And I'm very tired. I guess a week of sleeping will do that to you." I paused. "How long will I be casted?"

"The doctor's going to come back to check up on you in a month, and we'll go from there. You should probably stay off your feet for the next few days."

"Alright." I nodded again.

"Chances are you'll be in a cast for about eight weeks or so, maybe a little longer, before you're strong enough to walk unaided.

I yawned spontaneously. It was a big one, seeming to take forever to exhaust itself. The air stung against my broken tooth. Cloud seemed to take the yawn as a sign.

"Well, I'm glad you're better. It has been a long week. For both of us, I'm sure. You probably need to rest. I myself need to get back home. The vote on my desalinating system is tomorrow."

I was already half-asleep. "Alright then. Good luck. I'm sure it will be passed." I said, and put my head down on the mat.

"Thanks. I hope so. I'll come visit again in a few weeks to see how you're healing up. Maybe I'll come with the doctor. I'll see you later. Get some sleep."

Another jolt of pain in my mouth woke me up. My mouth was more of a hassle than my leg, which was acting tame by comparison. Cloud walked back through the doorway and stopped. He turned back, and I could see he had something else on his mind.

"Red during those first days when you were slipping in and out of consciousness you said some strange things. Like you were talking in your sleep, except you weren't really sleeping. Like I've said, you weren't in very good shape, so I dismissed what you were saying as just being your fever talking, but... I was just wondering, do you remember anything you said?"

"No, not at all. Today is really the first I can remember since I fell. Why? What did I say to you?"

Cloud was silent for a moment. He was thinking, trying to place the words in his head. Finally, he said "It must just have been the fever. I can't really remember right now what it was you said anyway. I haven't gotten much sleep lately. My brain's shutting down on me." He rubbed his forehead with the palm of his hand in fatigue.

I smiled, and Cloud smiled too. "Maybe some other time, then," I said. I knew inside me that Cloud hadn't forgotten anything, but if he felt I didn't need to know what I'd said, I would trust him in his belief.

"Goodbye, Red."

"Goodbye. See you in a couple weeks."

Cloud exited.

Whether he knew it or not, Cloud left me in that room a new person. He had made me realize the error of my ways. I would stop living my life for this goose chase of a search for more of my species. I would live for something else.

3.

It's a tough thing, being unable to walk. I remained on that bed in that room for three days, not moving around but for a minute at a time every few hours for the most basic of my needs. The residents of the canyon brought food to me, most of it cooked in the diner just down the ladder from Grandfather's house. I'm not much of a fan of cooked food. I just don't understand how humans can eat it. It's disgusting. I've only ever been able to stand eating small amounts of it at a time. I didn't have the heart to tell anyone how much I disliked the food; it seemed disrespectful to say something like that when these people were doing so much to try to help me. I ate what they brought out of courtesy and never said a word about it.

After the passing of those first few days, the walls seemed to be closing in on me. Such extreme boredom and claustrophobia were present in that room that, had I not braved the pain to begin to get up and limp around the pub on three legs once in a while, I may very well have gone mad. So it was that I began walking for short periods of time around the pub and the first level of the canyon. I was careful to take my time and not to overexert myself, as I was dizzy from my prolonged stasis in the room and knew that overactivity after the kind of trauma I'd suffered could produce some life-threatening complications in my injuries. I'll be sparing with the medical details except to say that those complications were very real possibilities. I still made my residence in that storage room, however, because I couldn't climb the stairs and ladder to Grandfather's house.

When the doctor and Cloud returned three weeks later, I could move around the first level of the canyon with relative ease, and found myself beginning to put some weight on my leg, though not really enough weight to walk on it with any effectiveness. The pain was still too great when I moved to walk on that leg.

Cloud had some good and some bad news for me about Costa del Sol. Good was that his desalination system had been approved and its use had begun, despite the fact that, as he said, it ran on mako energy which had been stored at the Corel mako reactor when it was still in use (there had been some opposition to his plan because of its Mako use). Bad was that he said two people had disappeared from the city while he was with me and four more had disappeared since he'd returned home.

It was strange, he told me. All six people had disappeared without any trace. All of their belongings had been left behind, but they had up and vanished. I found it odd as well that Cloud hadn't told me before that his machine used mako energy.

The doctor cut my cast off and examined my leg on the day he came, with much pain put in on my part. I'd never seen or heard of this doctor before, but by his actions and attitude toward Cloud, the canyon's residents, and me, he seemed a very shrewd and callous man. This conclusion came to me as he poked, prodded, and otherwise manipulated my leg in ways it likely shouldn't have been. He was, nevertheless, a good physician who seemed to know what he was doing. In only a few minutes he determined that I no longer needed a full cast but rather a walking cast, which would support my leg and still allow a fair amount of flexibility for walking. Possibly by some coincidence he had brought with him a cast that fit me perfectly.

Both Cloud and the doctor left three days later. The cast I was given was a removable hard brace that came up almost to my hip with a hinge at the knee. Below the knee it was basically a boot. My leg had severely atrophied due to disuse, and my fur had darkened where the sun hadn't bleached it for weeks. The joints in both my knee and ankle were rusty—the ligaments in my leg had shortened. I walked with a heavy limp for another week or so, but gradually all of these problems resolved themselves.

Within a month I had regained enough strength in my leg to remove the cast and climb the ladder to Grandfather's house. By then the last remaining sign of my accident was a scar over my knee left by the doctor's surgery. I climbed the ladder the first chance I had. The sun was just rising that morning as I climbed to the top of the canyon, throwing oranges and pinks across the sky, highlighting the edges of clouds just coming into visibility. I paused once up and looked around. It was a strange feeling, standing there. Everything stood in the same place it had been a full two months earlier, but... everything seemed different somehow. It had changed. I can't describe how, but I looked upon the plateau for the first time again.

My sight tracked across the ground and stopped at a point where the ground fell away. Fear struck me. My feet were suddenly stuck to the ground. Minutes passed silently. I could not break my gaze.

Nearly a minute passed before I could gather enough sensibility into me to take a step. I inched toward the fallen ledge very slowly. It took another minute to reach it. I peered over the edge of the plateau. The cliff, I saw, still was very unstable; several chunks of rock broke away from its face, tumbled down its side, bouncing out awkwardly off a section of jagged stones jutting into the open air, and hit the ground squarely. More than fifty feet, nearly straight down. I shuddered at the thought of myself falling the path those rocks had just taken. How could I possibly have survived? Some higher power must have been watching out for me—my guardian angel, maybe.

Taking great care with my steps, I backed away from the ledge and walked into Grandfather's house. Cloud had put away the bed for me. The house was spotlessly clean. I slept well that night, glad to be back in Grandfather's house, back in a place I knew.

Over the next months my leg got continually better and better, and life began to move on. Before I knew it, a year had passed, quite uneventfully.


	4. Restitution

Part Four

1.

It is a law of this world that time brings change. And though its occurrence ultimately is inevitable, it also is a truth that everyone and everything in this world harbors the will to resist that change, and will actively fight to do so. If this weren't a truth, the world would exist in a state of permanent chaos. It would be such that nothing remained constant for more than a second's time.

I think that once the circumstances of a person's life get to a satisfactory point, any sort of change to them becomes a fearful, unknown adversary, even a monster of sorts to some. And it is natural to fear the unknown because with it comes the potential for danger. That is why such a resistance exists.

For that reason it was, I suppose, that during the first year after I broke my leg, my sightings of unidentified objects did not cease. I merely chose to ignore them. Sometimes I found myself tempted to investigate those incidences, but my leg always was a reminder to me.

I have had many habits throughout my life, some good, some bad, some of them, such as my fondness for watching the night sky, which have persisted through the years. More than likely the most significant of these habits to me has been my desire to visit my father in the back of the canyon. I don't visit as much these days as I used to, but he remains a very important part of my life. I suppose I visit in part to pay my respects to him for having sacrificed himself so that I might live on, but back in those times it felt like there was another reason beyond that.

One summer night following the year I broke my leg, I paid a visit to him. It was a cool night, but not so much so as to be chilly. No clouds stood in the sky. The moon was large, very large, directly above, shining ample pale yellow-white light upon Seto's Valley (a name I've given to the area). Behind it a veil of stars draped itself, twinkling delicately, in the dark blue sky.

As I arrived on the rocky ground below my father, midnight came. The entire canyon was bathed in light. No shadows anywhere. I climbed the side of the cliff leading up to his body. Within a few moments I had reached the top of the cliff and was standing silently behind him. I think my father showed me my own mortality. He showed me the delicate nature of life, how easily it could be given and taken away. He represented to me the nature of all my beliefs and philosophies. He taught me, among other things, to have patience and understanding, and that everyone deserves a second chance.

I took a step forward. He remained still. The moonlight bleached the stone of his body. I took another step, and then another, and another, until I'd walked up next to him. We stood together, neck to neck, shoulder to shoulder, side by side. I was just as big as him now. When Grandfather Bugenhagen first showed him to me, he had looked huge, but now I had grown up.

"Seto..." I almost whispered it. "Father..."

The heavens shone down on us. He was still, and silence prevailed for a moment. I couldn't find any words. Usually I didn't say much of anything while there. It just felt comforting being with him.

"I miss you. Everyday." I said nothing more.

Seto gazed intensely through his frozen eyes across the valley. I looked him in the face for the first time that night and saw his stare. Looking off into the valley, I tried to match my sight to his. He looked downward across to a point about 200 meters away where a cliffside rose up from the ground. He effectively surveyed the entire area.

I lay down next to him. I had occasionally spent the night in the valley with my father. It was so, that night. I lay there for almost an hour, my sight drifting in and out over that valley my father protected.

And then movement down below caught my eye. I ignored it at first, dismissing it as a figment of my imagination. Usually that would stop whatever I saw or heard, but this time it was different. The movement continued, and I finally glanced down.

Shock hit me as I saw what it was moving below me. I jumped to my feet and stared down into the valley. Up against the now shadowed far wall of the valley walked a large quadruped animal, exactly the same as me, but maneless. A female maybe? She had a fire on the end of her tail as well, though hers was a white flame rather than the orange color of mine. The fire seemed almost to float about through the shadows as she walked. She was very beautiful in the light of the night. The moonlight paled the color of her fur nearly the same white as that her tail fire.

Instantly I was crouched low again, almost completely out of view below the edge of the cliff with my head just high enough up to continue watching her. She continued walking, stopping every so often and lowering her head to the ground. Sniffing the air, maybe. As time passed, I lost my caution and began to rise up from my crouch.

All of my attention rested on her. Before I knew it, I had stood straight up and was leaning over the cliff's edge to try to see her closer. I suppose I could have made a repeat performance and fallen over the edge of the cliff, distracted as I was, but fortunately the ground held, and nothing of the sort occurred. As I neared the edge, several large rocks broke free of the cliff and tumbled downward, shattering the silence which had held the night. She stopped in her tracks and swiftly looked up, directly at me. I was petrified by her stare. All was still for a split-second, and then she ran.

Almost simultaneously we exploded into action, she running and I chasing. I bolted down the side of the cliff from the direction I'd climbed, giving her a head start on me. By the time I'd reached the ground she'd opened up a gap of nearly 500 meters. My mind raced as I began running after her. In no time we were out of the canyon and were bounding through tall green grass in the open plains. The world, veiled in white moonlight, rushed by at a frenetic pace. The mountains rose up in the north and grew taller as we got nearer and nearer. I slowly closed in on her, cutting the distance between us in half once, and then again, before I saw her jump over something up ahead of me. I couldn't see what it was until I was almost on top of it.

It's strange... Without going into the details, I will say my tail fire helps sustain my life. If it were to be put out, I would slowly die, like a fish out of water. I can withstand rain without it being put out, I can withstand wind without it being blown out, and I can withstand combinations of the two. It seems that the only way my tail fire could ever be put out is if I were to be completely submerged in water. So naturally, I have an aversion to water.

And as I chased her, I nearly did submerge myself. I came close to running head-first into a river. Only by slamming on the breaks did I stay dry. Across the river the female ran up into the nearby mountains. I calmed, but only for a moment. At every second, she was farther from me.

In only a few seconds' time, I made the decision to cross the river. Backing up and taking a running start, I made the leap. About halfway through my jump, the thought crossed my mind for the first time that this was not a good idea, jumping over a river, and risking my life. But risking my life really is nothing new to me. I crossed safely, though just barely, landing on the edge of the opposite bank, and continued my pursuit up into the mountains.

She was far above me now. I could barely see her but for the occasional flash of light from her tail. I climbed as quickly as I could, keeping an eye on her as I went. My foot slipped once and I almost fell and lost sight of her, but my footing held otherwise.

At one point I did lose her light. She had gone over the top of the mountains. I hurried up to the top and found myself looking out over a crater in the mountain range. Far below in the crater, a lake glistened in fragments of yellow-white light. A waterfall flowed from the mountains into the water on one end of the lake, kicking up a slight mist around its surface. On its other end a river began and flowed away silently out of sight. Only the faint static sound of the waterfall was audible.

Also visible in the crater, the flame of the female's tail fire made its way along the lakeside toward the waterfall and disappeared behind it.

I made my way down into the crater after her. I was for some reason convinced that she was done running from me. But upon reaching the waterfall and looking behind it, I was surprised to see a completely empty space. The rocky ground stood empty, the mountain wall the same.

I quickly looked around the crater, hoping to catch some sight of her possibly escaping from the other side of the waterfall. Nothing. The roar of the water punching into the lake presented another direction she may have gone. I looked into the black water of the lake. Even with the moon shining down on it, the water was perfectly opaque. Had she fallen in, I would never know... And had she fallen in, she would not have survived.

The adrenaline slowed. I walked away from the waterfall, glancing at my surroundings, stopped about fifteen feet later, and looked back into the water, feeling defeated. The opaque black reflected the night sky. My reflection, palely lit, looked back up at me from the surface of the water, seeming almost to mock me, though I couldn't quite place how. The water rippled steadily upon him, that reflection, breaking him into a convulsing, laughing figure. It was a... disconcerting image.

I broke my gaze and had begun to walk away when from behind me came a loud rumbling noise, as though a large mass were being moved. For a moment it sounded, and then it was gone. I stopped, shocked for a moment, turned, and investigated the area the sound had come from. Back behind the waterfall, where the stone wall had previously stood, there now was an opening. Without any sort of cautionary thought, I walked through.

The opening led inside to a rather large cave. As I first came into the cave I was amazed. As far as the eye could see in every direction huge pyramid-like formations, like stalagmites, jutted upward from the ground 20 or 30 feet into the air. They all were made of a cerulean blue rock, almost mimicking the waves of the ocean. As those spires rolled into the distance, a black haze enveloped them, effectively shielding them from view. I stepped into a circular clearing, very flat, also made of the blue rock. It had a sheen on its surface which reflected the light in the room, as though it were polished. Directly ahead of me on the opposite side of the clearing, the source of the room's light, some sort of glowing altar, steadily radiated a diffused white light in every direction from a bright point at its center. Tall structures of some other material than the rock prevalent everywhere else jutted out of the ground directly behind the altar, wing-like structures fanned out perfectly. To get a better view of the light source, I stepped up to the altar and ducked my head in close to it. Squinting, I could make out almost indiscernibly an orb five or six inches in diameter. Some sort of raw materia, maybe. If so, it was most definitely not any kind I'd seen before. Having no interest in taking it, I backed up from the altar. Just as I did, though, the same rumbling from before started up. By the time I'd turned to look, the rumbling had stopped, and the entrance to the cave had been replaced by a blue rock wall.

Almost immediately the light from the altar disappeared, and the entire cave was plunged into darkness. I worried a bout being trapped for a split second—the darkness seemed to have sparked that thought—but quickly the light on the altar returned. It pulsed now, its light slowly and smoothly oscillating from dim to bright, then fading away into nothing, leaving the cave black for a few seconds, and beginning again in the same manner and rhythm. For a few minutes this continued, and then the light faded away and did not come back.

I quickly adjusted to the darkness and could see perfectly well again. The room was vacant and now lifeless in the dark with exception of myself. Upon inspection of darkened the cave, I saw a hole, like a doorway, in the stalagmite directly behind the altar. I could see nothing beyond it even after I'd adjusted to the darkness, but nonetheless I stepped through it.

A long hallway, cut in an arched shape out of the rock walls, wound back deep into the mountain. I walked for several minutes through the dark hall without coming to its end. And then, out of the darkness, came a set of large, metallic automatic doors. They stood motionless about ten feet tall, spanning the width of the hall. They looked to be in disuse, as they were not shut completely together. On the right-side door, about six feet up, I read a dimly visible sign:

NO TRESPASSING

PROPERTY OF SHIN-RA ELECTRIC CO.

Below I saw another sign, but in the darkness I only could make out the words 'Shin-Ra,' 'world,' and 'energy.' On the other door I read another sign, outlined in yellow and black stripes:

DANGER:

AUTOMATIC DOORS

DO NOT STAND IN DOORWAY

And just below that, a caution sign depicting a human being mutilated by closing doors.

The space in between the doors showed an expanse of nothing beyond. The space between the doors looked to be wide enough that I could squeeze through if I tried. In the same manner I'd been doing things that entire night, I impulsively edged my way through to the other side.

Just as I got through the doorway, light returned. The doors slammed shut behind me, giving me a slight start. An unpleasant thought shot through my mind like a sharp pain. I imagine I grimaced at that thought, being stuck in those doors as they slammed shut. The thought was gone the next second as I adjusted to the light and looked at my surroundings.

The room I now stood in appeared to be a laboratory. It lay sprawled out before me, as big or bigger than the cave I'd just left. The light came from fixtures high above me in the ceiling. Large machines sat around the place, creating aisles wide enough for maybe two people to walk in at a time. So overwhelmed with the size of this place was I that I felt that if she were hiding somewhere in here, I would never find her.

Nevertheless I set out looking. And it did seem to be as futile as I had thought. I looked through aisle after aisle, machine after machine, section after section of the laboratory, finding nothing. Soon I was hopelessly lost deep in the rows of machinery. Many times I thought I'd found something or heard something: shadows, footsteps, whispers that came from nowhere and everywhere at once. These senses gave me an eery feeling, like prey being watched, being hunted. Things were turning against me. After a while of wandering, I stumbled into a clearing free of machines. On the ground were several nests of fabric, blankets probably, arranged in a disorderly line seven nests long. I smelled something bad in this area. It provoked me, making the fur on my back stand up on end. In one of the nests I saw a headdress like mine, with seven feathers in it. More whispers from somewhere behind me. Moving over to the nest, I leaned over and smelled the headdress. Not the same smell. Suddenly I heard rapid footsteps approaching me from behind. Interrupted, I wheeled around to see what it was, and, by instinct, unsheathed my claws and prepared to fight. Before I had a chance to strike or even see what was rushing me, I was hit to the ground on my side by something large and powerful. Now I saw. For a split-second my sight held the twisted, contorted, angry face of a maned animal, an exact image of myself in the face and the body, but with two angry, fiery eyes, and of a much larger stature. The last thing I remember was the image of a front paw with four sharp claws swiftly moving into view toward my face and its incredible impact.

2.

Reality isn't always what we may want it to be. Not all our efforts lead to desired results. Not all things happen for the betterment of life. Not all memories are happy ones. It's unfair. Unfair that we don't live in a perfect world with perfect people, leading our own perfect lives. Parents die. Children die. Friends die. Memories are lost and memories are gained, all with no heed to emotion or justice. There truly is a harsh truth to face. You can't change the past, and it seems you can't change the future either.

A moment passed when I came to before I quite realized where I was. The same place surrounded me. A mass of machinery lay in a line all around me. I myself was laid out in one of the nests I'd seen before. The nest next to me, I saw, was occupied by the female I'd been chasing. The other five nests were empty and in a state of disarray.

I froze upon seeing her and felt my heart rate increase. She slept, rather soundly it seemed, her head lightly rested across a foreleg with her hind legs tucked under her body as though she would be ready if woken to spring up to full attention instantly. I watched in amazement and disbelief, careful not to wake her, and studied her. She really had finished running.

I remember wondering to myself if I was dreaming. This whole situation felt unreal. I half-expected at any moment to wake up back in Grandfather's house alone, Cloud there to scold my thoughts, but nothing happened. The soft heaving of her chest in and out as she breathed continued on.

She was even more beautiful than she had looked in the moonlight. She was noticeably smaller than me, her body slenderly built. She looked delicate in her sleep. The angles in her face were beautifully smooth, giving her a remarkably young look. No imperfections anywhere. And her eyes were shut peacefully, relaxed. I couldn't have wished for anything better to wake up to. She was like a perfect dream sleeping before me. Looking back on it, I suppose it could have been called love at first sight.

As I looked upon her, she awoke. Her body came to life, and she lazily lifted her head to me.

"You're awake," she said pleasantly. Her voice was beautiful, perfectly pairing every other aspect of her beauty. It was soft but strong, smooth and full.

Her words floated around me for a moment before I answered. "Yes, I am awake."

She smiled dreamily and got to her feet to stretch herself out.

"How are you feeling?" she asked as she dipped into a deep stretch.

For the first time I felt the soreness in my face and in my ribs.

"Fairly well. I'm sore."

She smiled again. "My brother is very strong. He really could have hurt you."

"Your brother?" I was surprised.

"Bikhai. He's my brother."

"I don't think your brother likes me much..."

"Well, we all thought you were an intruder or a monster of some sort. He was only protecting us."

"Us? How many others are there?"

"You mean my family?"

I nodded.

"There were twelve of us, but there only are seven of us left: my grandfather, Panth, my father, Chatur, my mother, Anand, my brother, Bikhai, my other brother, Erevu, my sister, Daya, and me. I'm Malaika."

It stunned me to think that there lived so many others of my kind. And so near Cosmo Canyon. All that time... Cloud was wrong.

"It's nice to meet you, Malaika..." I finally managed to say. "My name is Nanaki."

"Nanaki... That's a nice name. It sounds... elegant."

She said my name perfectly. Not many people I'd met could say my name. There were the people of Cosmo Canyon, and that was about it. Others knew me only as Red XIII. Maybe it wasn't that it was such a difficult name to say as it was that people never felt comfortable with the name Nanaki. Red XIII was more informal in their eyes.

It was as I thought about this that I noticed on Malaika's shoulder black markings. A tattoo of the number twelve in Roman numerals. And on her back legs there also were tattoos. The same as mine. I prepared to ask her about them, but just as I opened my mouth to speak, a member of her family walked into the clearing behind me. Malaika's attention was diverted from me.

"Bikhai," she said to the stranger. "Come meet Nanaki."

Bikhai passed me on my right, brushing lightly against me, walked to his sister, and turned to face me. He had the tattoos as well. I saw an eleven on his left shoulder. They both had the same tattoos, but neither of them had the bangles I wore around my ankles.

"Nanaki, huh?" he said in a deep, unforgiving voice.

He was of a much larger stature than his sister and even me, and he seemed to attempt to use it to his advantage. He hulked over me, apparently trying to intimidate me, trying to make me feel small. His face, wrapped up in a wicked scowl, was unfamiliar to me. He was the one who had attacked me, but he bore no resemblance to me as I'd thought my attacker had. Why had I...? Bikhai ran his fiery eyes across me, scanning for any weaknesses he could find.A thick scar cut a vertical notch in his nose and ran a crooked path halfway up his muzzle, showing a blackened line of skin underneath.

Finally, seemingly satisfied with what he saw, Bikhai turned to his sister and whispered something into her ear. I wasn't quite sure what he said, but something about the way he treated me infuriated me. I swallowed my anger, though, and remained calm.

"No, not now Bikhai," Malaika said, answering his whisper.

"Why?" I heard Bikhai ask back privately. It was like I was not there. "Well, when?"

"I don't know. Later." She spoke in an irritated manner.

Bikhai shot a glare at me. "Alright. Later, then," he said flatly, and turned and walked away. At the far edge of the clearing he stopped and said over his shoulder in a faintly mocking tone "Sorry about last night. I hope I didn't hurt you..." He followed that up, muttering something else under his breath that I couldn't make out, and having said it, was gone.

"I really don't think your brother likes me," I said.

"Don't worry. He's nicer once you get to know him..."

I doubted it. I could already tell we were destined not to get along.

"...But he really can be a baby sometimes." We both laughed, though I did so a bit tentatively. "Do you know what he wanted? A walk!"

"A walk?"

She proceeded to answer a question I hadn't asked. "A year ago my grandmother died. Of course she was also Bikhai's grandmother. Our family was hit hard by her death; it hit my grandfather, me, and Bikhai especially hard. I don't think my grandfather has ever fully recovered from it. Her death changed him permanently. Bikhai became very solemn and cynical back then, rarely speaking to anyone except to reproach them for some individual fault he saw. He'd never been like that before... He really looked up to our grandmother. In a way, she was his idol. I was saddened more than anything. But whereas Bikhai closed up, shielded himself from the world, and hid his emotions, I was very open about my sadness. I spent night after night away from everyone, missing her. Once I cried out to her out by the lake outside, hoping she would hear me through my howls. One night Bikhai found me. We had never been very close before, but...we connected then and comforted each other. Neither of us felt alone with the other near. I think we helped each other recover from our loss. We spent a lot of time together in those months following Grandmother's passing. We walked together at dusk, slept next to each other every night, and we walked and talked with each other in the daytime. In that time we really came close. Walking has just become a custom between us."

It was during her story that I realized it was she I'd heard a year earlier on top of the canyon. And maybe that wasn't all. Cloud was more wrong than I'd initially thought.

She seemed uncomfortable telling me this story. The pain apparently hadn't yet completely passed. "So Nanaki, I've told you something about myself. What about you?" She seemed for the first time to notice the scar over my right eye. "What happened?"

I really didn't want to talk about it. But... it seemed I'd opened up an old wound, and it was only right that she do the same. "The GI War. A warrior slashed out my eye."

"Do you have trouble seeing? I mean, looking through one eye it's hard to judge distances and stuff." She closed one of her eyes and looked around as she spoke, trying to mimic my sight. "Do have problems like that?" She looked me in the face, both of her eyes again open.

"No, not anymore. It used to be completely debilitating... But you get used to it after a while. I've found alternate means to judge distances and to cope with the other problems related to my sight. These days it's not so much of an impairment as it is just a different way of seeing."

She nodded empathetically. "I heard about the war from here when I was young."

"How long have you lived here?"

"As long as I can remember—my entire life, really. One of my first memories is of my grandmother telling me about the GI War. She told me that bad people were killing our families and friends. She didn't ever say why, other than we had done something to upset them."

Families, she said... Families. I didn't have much memory from before the war. I'd never known any families other than my own.

"Both of my parents were killed in the war." In my mind I saw the arrows protruding from my mother's back. I saw her dying in front of me. "I was lucky," I continued. "I ended up a casualty, not a part of the body count. I was left for dead, but I survived."

"My grandmother told me that the humans had brought us to this lab because they thought we would be the last of our kind after the war. Were you the only one who survived?"

I said nothing.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean... If I'd known..." She seemed to have stumbled into the conversation farther than she wanted.

Nothing was said for a moment. I felt embarrassed, though I didn't know why.

"So you're thirteen?" She eyed my tattoo. "I'm twelve. The scientists gave my family tattoos like this when they brought us to the lab. My grandfather is number one, my father is four, my mother five, my sister eight, my brother, Erevu, nine, and Bikhai is eleven. How did you get your tattoos?

Hojo. "After the war, after I'd recovered from my wounds, I was captured, probably by the same people who took you and your family, and taken to a city where I was forced to take part in experiments involving a recovery program for our species. Needless to say, me being alone, it didn't work."

"And so you've lived alone all this time?"

"Not exactly. There have always been humans in Cosmo Canyon. I've befriended many over the years. But, yes, I do suppose there has always been... a wall, I guess, between them and me. ...It's good to see you. It's good to see your family. It's a good feeling."

I lied to myself and to Malaika. I always had felt alone, completely so. Sometimes my solitude scared me, as though the reality of my existence were going to overwhelm and envelop me, and I would be lost. Sometimes it saddened me to know that there was no one else, that I had no one to be with or to rely on. And sometimes it angered me to think of the short-sidedness of the world, killing my family, my friends, and my species, and leaving me behind to deal with it, to suffer the consequences of its actions alone.

Even Malaika and her family had not suffered through the war as I had, but had been carted off to safety in the mountains. But I felt different about her and her family. I felt that they could and would empathize with me as no one else could. I felt that they could understand me and, even though they were not with me at the time, understand the suffering I'd gone through. That day when I met her, all my true feelings of loneliness and anguish ended.

3.

Throughout the day Malaika introduced me to her family. I met her sister, Daya, her older brother, Erevu, who was reading a book on the technology and energy sources of the past, and I met her mother, Anand.

Anand had an aura about her. The air around her seemed soothingly warm. She had a very caring, perpetually happy and accepting attitude. She greeted me as I met her as a new member of her family. One the few details of her appearance I can vividly recall today was her odd and beautiful eye color. That is to say I can picture her eye color, but I find it very difficult to describe. It was a whitish color, almost a pure white, rimmed in a cerulean blue with radial streaks of the same color circling around her pupil and just a faint tinge of yellow all around. The image has been etched into my mind. I'll never forget it.

Malaika's father, Chatur, lay asleep when Malaika brought me to see him. We left his location quietly and went to find her grandfather, Panth.

"You seem like the silent type. Like you spend a lot of your time with thought," she said as we searched. "You'll like my grandfather, I think. He spends a lot of his time thinking too. He's always a good person to go to for advice. He can always provide different perspectives on situations."

We could not find Panth inside the lab, so we walked outside to search. Back through the two metal doors we went, into the long stone hallway, and out into the cave with the strange glowing materia on the winged altar. Daylight, turned a fluctuating blue hue by the flowing waterfall outside, shone in from the entrance. Once outside we saw him. He was talking with someone I recognized as Bikhai across the lake from us. Bikhai seemed unhappy. He spoke to Panth loudly so that, even though Malaika and I were a good twenty to thirty yards away with the rush of the waterfall in our ears, I could hear him clearly.

"-ink it's a bad idea. Things have been this way too long. Who knows what he-" Bikhai turned his head and spotted us. His talking stopped, mid-word.

Panth said something in response to his statements, but I could not hear it. Bikhai's head turned back to his grandfather and nodded unwillingly. Malaika and I approached the two just as Bikhai turned to walk away.

Malaika said to me "I'll give you some time with Grandfather," and then ran to Bikhai's side and said to him "How about that walk?"

Together, the two of them walked away.

In front of me now stood Panth. He was as large as or larger than Bikhai, making me feel once again rather small and insignificant. His body showed the signs of age; scars cut his face and body in many places. His skin was loose, and his fur had lost quite a bit of its color, turned a darkened, grayed-over shade of maroon. His face was sleepy, as though he had not had rest in a long time.

"Nanaki?" he asked. Even his voice had a hint of sleepiness in it.

"Yes."

"It is good to meet you."

I smiled. "Likewise."

"You live in Cosmo Canyon?"

I nodded.

"We thought all of the Rufus were killed in the GI War."

"Rufus?" All I could think of in association with that name was Shin-Ra.

"That is the name they gave our species—the scientists who held us in this laboratory, I mean. They took us from the canyon and brought us here. They feared something like the GI War was about to erupt in which a total extermination of our species was a great possibility, so, nearly a year before the war began, they abducted twelve individuals from the canyon, myself included, and brought them here."

He, too, was answering a question which, although I was interested, I hadn't asked.

"They held us in this hidden laboratory against our will and performed tests to help 'ensure the future of our species,' as they put it. News of the war's beginning made it to us within a year of our abduction, and also with that came some doubts as to the future of the species recovery program we were involved in. It seemed it was in danger of being shut down even so soon after it had begun. The scientists said someone new had joined the higher ranks of Shin-Ra, the company sponsoring the program. They said this person had control over their branch of the company and that this person was not likely to provide the funds needed to continue the program. The war continued, and we were informed of it by the scientists occasionally. I think I speak for nearly everyone of us in this family when I say I would have, given the chance, returned to Cosmo Canyon to fight and protect it, but... the chance never came. We hated the laboratory for a time, we hated the people in it, and we hated the tests we were forced to endure, but it all became less and less foreign and inhospitable the longer we stayed. By the time the war ended, this place was like a second home to us. The war ended, they said, as a total loss. We were told that we represented the last hope for our species, that our kind had been wiped out in the outside world. Soon after that, the recovery program was shut down. It happened overnight. We woke up one day to an empty lab. The machines remained, but the inhabitants had gone. We were free to leave, but we felt the outside might still be dangerous, so we remained here.

"It's safe now," I explained.

"Yes, I suppose it is..." And he left it at that.

In the quiet that followed I spied the tattoo on Panth's shoulder. A one, just as Malaika had said.

"You are number one?"

Panth looked confused for a second.

"I'm thirteen," I said, and showed him my tattoo.

He caught on. "Oh, yes. I am Red I. Both this name and tattoo were given to me upon my first arrival to the laboratory. Identification, I assumed. Every one of the other eleven was given the tattoos as well. Numerals from two to twelve were given to them in descending order from ages oldest to youngest as far as I could tell. But how did you get your tattoo?"

I told him about my experience with Shin-Ra and with Hojo.

"That is interesting. It poses to me a question. This Hojo gave you the number thirteen. That would suggest he knew about the recovery program. But why, if he knew of it, did he not come back to this laboratory and start it up again?"

We both thought for a moment about this. It did seem strange. Hojo was, in my mind, a fool, but he was an intelligent fool nonetheless. He really hadn't cared about our species when conducting the experiments I'd been involved in. It was the Cetra he had aimed to revive. Even if he had known about the recovery program, he may not have cared enough about us to restart it. But still, I thought, if he'd known he had an entire second laboratory at his disposal, he wouldn't have hesitated to take full advantage of it.

"He must have known only of the project and not where it was run from," I concluded. I tried unsuccessfully to make sense of it. "Like you said, there was a power change in Shin-Ra that shut the program down. Records of the program may have been lost, leaving only rumors behind." It seemed unresolved. I remembered a detail of what Panth had said before. "You said that, including yourself, there were twelve individuals brought to the laboratory. What did you mean by 'individuals?' Aren't you all a part of the same family?"

"No, we are not related to each other. Our family is not one of relatives but one of closely knit friends. We have bonded over the years and come closer together. At first we did it to help each other through our captivity, but it evolved into something more, our companionship did, after the war. Learning that our species had been all but wiped out was devastating. Being together helped us cope with this fact. It helped quell the feelings of solitude and loneliness that engulfed us."

I remember thinking to myself that he didn't know what solitude truly felt like. He never was truly alone. I resented his use of that word.

We walked together back into the cave behind the waterfall. Erevu, who earlier had been reading the book on technology, stood now in front of the altar. He appeared to be inspecting it. The sound of our approach broke his head away from it toward us. His two dark eyes inspected Panth and me momentarily. Unconcerned, he turned back to his inspection. I saw him lean in closer to the altar for a moment and then lean back away, and as he did so, the doorway to the outside rumbled shut, cutting off all light but the glowing altar and our tail fires. Erevu's silhouette could be seen on the altar, his shadow stretching out behind him. On the wall behind the altar a nine winged shadow stretched out toward the darkness in the distance of the cavern.

The light began pulsing as it had the night before, silently coming and going. After a moment the light dimmed out and did not come back. The whole sequence happened exactly as I remembered.

Through the darkness I heard Panth say to me "You look interested Nanaki. If you would like to learn about what has just happened, why don't you stay here and talk to my grandson?" He did not give me a chance to answer before leaving my side and entering the darkened doorway behind the altar.

I stood in the darkness, letting myself adjust to the available light.

From the direction of the altar came another voice. "This is an interesting little device, huh?"

"Yes," I answered. As I answered, the light from the altar returned, and the door to the waterfall outside opened again. The entrance Panth had gone through had disappeared.

Erevu turned to me, smiling, as though he himself were amused and amazed by what had just occurred. "This entire pedestal is some sort of energy conduit. The laboratory supplies the power."

"What does it do?"

"Well..." He seemed not to be quite sure. "I've been studying just that for many years now. Do you see that?" He motioned toward the orb at the center of the altar. "That is some sort of materia. From what I've been able to find out, it is a type of identification materia."

"Identification materia?" I had heard of many different kinds of materia that had no good use or any use at all, but identification materia was a new one to me.

"It has no practical use other than to identify its user. That in itself doesn't seem very useful, huh?"

I agreed.

"A long time ago I saw some scientists working on a computer near my holding cell. They talked about this materia while using that computer, talking about things like 'reformatting the materia.' After the humans left the lab I looked on their computer. Somehow or another they managed to rig the materia to act as a verification system of sorts. If the person identified by the materia belonged to a certain group of people, the passage to the lab opened. Otherwise the lab would remain hidden."

"Interesting," I said.

"Through research I've discovered that this materia passes an image of its user through some sort of wiring below ground into the lab where it is processed to see if it is a valid user, allowing the lab's entrance to open or stay shut. I've managed to get into the computer system and change things around to where only members of our species can gain entry to the lab. I thought that meant only my family could enter, but I guess you proved otherwise."

I smiled but felt awkward doing so. There was something I wanted to ask, but I didn't quite know what it was.

"It's good to meet you, Nanaki. You seem like a good person. I hope I'll get to know you better. I'll see you later." Erevu leaned in toward the materia for a moment. The cavern disappeared, and the fire on his tail began to move for the dark hallway.

"Wait," I said to the fire. It stopped. "The lab powers this conduit, right?"

"Yes, why?"

"Where does the lab get its power from?"

Erevu was silent for a moment. "...Good question. I don't know." He seemed content to leave it at that and continued walking back to the lab, disappearing into the dark hallway.

A moment later the light returned.

4.

I stayed with Malaika's family for the next few days, and I won't lie—despite the accepting front they put up, I felt like an outsider. While I was happy no longer to be alone, I still felt I didn't quite belong. I felt most comfortable around Malaika. She seemed to put up no guards against me, not reserving anything from me. We talked freely with each other, which I think is the quality that separated her from the others. I connected with her very quickly. Bikhai pestered me, and he seemed to derive a certain pleasure in doing so. He annoyed me and even angered me on a few occasions, and were it not for my diplomatic intentions, making a good impression with his family, we would have had a few fights. And Panth told me many times not to mind his grandson's behavior, that it merely would take time to get used to my presence. Panth was the worst out of all of them. I never did feel truly comfortable around him. It seemed like he had set some sort of expectation for me to live up to. Maybe it was that when he spoke to me he seemed distant and closed up, wrapped up in another mindset or thought than that of which he spoke. He seemed sad at times, and he seemed almost to be tormented at other times. Maybe that's why it was so uncomfortable.

Whatever the case, on the third day of my stay I decided to return to Cosmo Canyon. I'd likely worried the canyon's residents, disappearing for so long without a trace, and though living with Malaika's family was comparable to living a dream, I felt I needed to return to reality, at least for a time.

It was very early morning, well before sunrise, as I said my goodbyes, that Malaika approached me with a request.

"You're going back home?"

"Yes. I figure it's time to return to my responsibilities."

She looked disappointed. "But... you'll return, right?"

"Without a doubt." I got an idea. "Hey, why don't you come back to Cosmo Canyon with me? I can introduce you to the villagers. You could come live there and leave this laboratory behind."

She looked confused, as though she had never before thought of doing what I'd asked her. I suddenly felt foolish.

"...No... I can't..." She looked hurt now. "I've lived here so long... because of the war."

"It's not dangerous anymore," I explained.

"I know that, but... Even though I was born in the canyon and lived the beginning of my life within its borders... it isn't my home any longer. This laboratory is. My family has lived here out of the world's eye for more than 200 years. It's been peaceful, and it has been comfortable, living here. I don't want any of that to change. Maybe I'm just afraid, but... I don't want that peace to be lost."

It now was I who was disappointed. "I understand. I'll return then in a few days. Goodbye." It came out differently than I'd hoped it would. I did understand what she said, and I respected it too, but I came off sounding childish, like she had upset me.

"Nanaki?"

I stopped.

"Please don't tell anyone about us. Okay?"

"Sure," I said. "I'll see you soon."

I had reached the canyon by daybreak.


	5. The Old Life

Part Five

1.

The sun just broke the horizon as I ascended the steps into the village, and the sky shone in a darkened yellow light. The canyon, though it had been asleep, was fully awake within moments of my arrival. I received a warm and relieved welcome from everyone in the village as I'd expected I would, and I myself was glad to be home again.

The entire day I was welcomed back to the canyon and questioned as to where I'd been for the past few days. Naturally, I had no explanation other than 'I was out.' I wanted to tell someone, anyone, what I'd seen, but I knew I couldn't. And I couldn't think of anything else to tell them. Maybe I'd gone to Costa del Sol, or maybe to see the humans in Corel. But why? It felt wrong lying to them... I didn't feel good doing it.

But the mere fact that I could and did lie to them showed me that there had been some sort of change inside me. Something had caused me to see the canyon's people in a different light. Something allowed me to lie to them. ...I don't know how to describe what it felt like except to say that it just didn't feel quite right, that something had happened in those past couple days. I found myself restless now that I was back within Cosmo Canyon's walls.

Cloud came to the Canyon soon after my return, although he did not come to welcome me back. He brought with him some very troubling news.

"Red, they're all gone," he said in a flat tone when he arrived.

I didn't understand at first, but his voice concerned me. "What do you mean?"

"Everyone from Costa del Sol. They've all disappeared."

"What? Everyone? How is that possible?" I could tell he was serious. "What happened?"

"I don't know. It was so sudden. I woke up this morning and the town was empty. They were just gone. Their belongings are still in their homes, but the people are missing. I've looked all day, but I haven't found anyone at all. It's like they just vanished onto thin air."

What he said shocked me. "Well, calm down some and think. Do you remember anything that someone may have said to you yesterday, somewhere they may have gone?"

"No. I thought about it the entire day today. Nothing. Nowhere."

I could tell he was grasping for answers desperately, and I could tell he was finding nothing. He feared for his safety. I worried about him too. How could an entire town of people disappear overnight? Why was Cloud left behind?

"Red, can I stay here in Cosmo Canyon for a while? Just until I can figure things out?"

"Of course. I think maybe you should. At least for a couple weeks or so."

He looked relieved at my agreement. He apparently had come with no intention of leaving either, as he had brought with him a small carload of belongings, mostly clothes. He moved with me into Grandfather's house, and again I made a makeshift bed for him on its first floor. By nightfall Cloud had fully moved in and readied himself to stay the night.

Not much was said about Costa del Sol the rest of the night, but neither of us stopped thinking about it. An entire town...

2.

"Really it didn't happen all at once. There have been people disappearing for months now, but it was only one or two at a time then. Over the past few days though the number increased dramatically. Almost half the town disappeared overnight last night."

Cloud and I stood outside Grandfather's house, looking out into the nighttime darkness over the edge of the canyon. A thick layer of clouds covered the sky, cast in a shade of dark brown, a slightly rusty color.

"For months? Why didn't you leave the town earlier?" I turned my head to him.

"I don't know. It didn't seem like a problem until a few days ago. But I'd heard you had disappeared as well, so I guess I figured I'd wait to see if you would return... Seems stupid now."

"Don't worry about it, Cloud. There's nothing to do about it now. We'll find out what happened soon, and then we'll worry about it."

Cloud turned to look at me with a puzzled expression on his face. "Where were you?"

"What do you mean?" I tried to pretend I didn't understand his question.

"When you went missing. Where were you?"

"Oh..." I wanted to tell him, but I couldn't, so I stalled. "Why?"

"I don't know. I thought the same thing had happened to you that had been happening to the people in Costa del Sol. I was just wondering. I mean, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"Well..." The pressure quickly overwhelmed me, and before I knew it, the secret was spoken. "Cloud, can you keep a secret?"

"Maybe," he said in a deceivingly serious manner. "It depends on the secret."

His response put doubts into my mind. "Maybe I shouldn't tell you."

"No, no. I was kidding. If you feel like it needs to be kept a secret, I'll keep it a secret."

I was still hesitant. "...Well... Let me say first that you were wrong."

"About?"

"I found them while I was gone."

Unsurprisingly, he still did not understand.

"Cloud, these past few days that I've been missing I've been living with a family of my own kind," I said bluntly.

"What?" He was in disbelief. "Really?"

I nodded, smiling. "I still can hardly believe it myself. It's amazing."

"Where?" Cloud seemed able only to speak one word at a time.

"I promised not to tell. They don't want to be known about by the outside world and humanity."

His disbelief suddenly shifted to non-belief. "Why?"

"I... I don't know. They've been living there for a long time."

I wanted to tell him. I wanted him to believe me. I wanted him to know it was true. But I didn't know the answer to his question and could say nothing. Silently, I looked off at the dirty clouds in the distance. I could feel Cloud's stare for a moment, and then he too was looking off into the distance.

"I'm telling the truth," I said without breaking my gaze.

Cloud said nothing and walked away. Frustrated, I sighed sharply.

He took a few steps away from me and stopped. "Red?" he called back. "Do you see that light?"

I turned to look at Cloud who was on the northern edge of the plateau, near the place I'd fallen from.

"You should stay away from that spot," I said to him lifelessly. "The ground there isn't very stable. It's dangerous."

Cloud backed up a few steps and asked again, "Do you see it? In the north."

I walked over to him, searching for the light, at first unsuccessfully. I thought maybe Cloud was trying to get a point across to me, but then I saw it, very faintly at first, but more and more clearly as the seconds passed.

Over the top of the mountains in the north, rays of light shone up into the clouds in a vibrant pale green color, fluctuating in intensity and position fairly rapidly. The rays swayed back and forth in the sky like the shadows cast by a light moving through the trunks of trees in a forest.

"What is that?" I asked.

We both stood quietly watching the lights play back and forth below the bank of clouds.

"I don't know," came his reply.

The lights looked to be emanating from a single source on the opposite side of the mountain. They radiated outward like a fan.

"It's not making any noise, whatever it is. Unsettling." Cloud spoke in whispers, almost as though he were afraid to speak up lest he should be discovered.

As I watched, an inexplicable feeling of anxiety and dread crossed me, and I couldn't shake it off. It gripped me and held me, nearly paralyzed, to my spot.

"I don't know why, but that light worries me. Something about it... frightens me." The dread and anxiety grew within me to an almost unbearable level, even as I spoke.

"Is that why you're worried," he stated. "They're out there by that light, aren't they, Red?"

"You believe me then?" I glanced at him quickly.

"I never said I didn't. But that's why you're worried, isn't it?"

"Maybe." I didn't think so. There was something else, I thought. ...Cloud... His comments put even more fear into my mind. "It's coming."

3.

The lights shone over the mountains for the remainder of the night and were, by morning, gone. Cloud had spoken the truth the night before. The lights seemed to have come from the direction of the laboratory where Malaika's family lived. I was worried about her.

I left before Cloud woke up. Day had broken before I got to the lake in the mountains. I stepped behind the waterfall and entered the blue cavern with the stalagmite waves. The light from the materia on the altar was out, leaving the cavern very dark. I leaned in close to the altar as I remembered Erevu had done before, but nothing happened. The long hallway to the lab remained hidden. I tried again, but with no more luck. Unable to get into the lab, I walked back outside. By the lake I saw Malaika standing alone, looking rather distressed.

Quickly running up to her, I asked "What's wrong? Are you alright?"

She looked behind herself at the waterfall which rushed faintly into the lake.

"My brother is missing."

"Bikhai?"

"No. Erevu. He's been missing since last night sometime. Bikhai is out looking for him."

"He disappeared last night?"

"Without a trace. Where would he go?"

"Maybe he just... went out. I'm sure he'll be back."

"I can smell him all around the lake. And I found blood on the ground by the mouth of the cave next to the waterfall."

Blood. I didn't know what to say.

"Now you understand why I'm so scared."

As she spoke, I saw something move behind a large rock on the side of the mountain.

"He'll be fine, I'm sure," I said. "Erevu seems very smart. If he's in trouble he'll find a way to get safe."

I saw the movement again. My heart jumped as a flash of yellow dove back behind the large rock. My heart jumped. I'd not left so early as I thought. He'd followed me. My body burned in shock and budding anger.

"Do you think so?" Malaika asked me.

My attention was not really on her, but on the rock Cloud hid behind. I looked at her only just long enough to say "definitely." I kept myself calm outwardly, excused myself, and walked away from Malaika over to where Cloud lay hidden.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed angrily at him, being careful to keep my voice down so as not to alert Malaika.

"...Is that...?" He was fixed on Malaika.

"Why did you follow me?"

He seemed to notice me finally. "Is she for real?" he asked, looking at me in awe.

"Cloud, why did you follow me?" I demanded. I calmed down slightly.

"I... I wanted to see if-"

"If I told the truth? Cloud, why would I lie?"

"You were always telling the truth?"

"Yes," I explained, calming a little. "These past years I haven't been lying." The anger quickly sparked back up. "I can't believe you thought that. And you followed me!" I tried to keep my voice down.

"I just wanted to see for sure..."

"That's childish, Cloud. You-" I was cut off by a voice behind me.

"Nanaki?"

I turned to find Malaika staring blankly at Cloud, frozen in her place.

Oh no. "Malaika," was all I could say. My chest burned. My heart felt like it was about to burst. I felt like a thief, caught red-handed.

She glanced blankly at me for a second and then back at Cloud.

"I..." Again I could not complete a thought.

Abruptly, Malaika ran away from me, back toward the cave. She was gone behind the waterfall before I had a chance to react.

"Oh no..." came out of me, and then I exploded at Cloud. "Cloud! Get out of here! Now!" I snarled the words and then ran after Malaika.

The cave behind the waterfall was closed off when I got to it. For a few moments I waited beside it, trying to explain to Malaika in my mind why I'd brought a human to her home, trying to calm myself down. My broken leg shook erratically under the weight of my thoughts. Behind me, Cloud sat on the ground, stunned. I'd never said anything like that to him. I was, in his eyes, a pacifist. It caught him off-guard. He may actually have thought I was going to hurt him. I looked again behind the waterfall. No entrance yet. Below me I saw a red stain on the rocks. How could I explain to her? The cave entrance rumbled open, and I entered. The cave was lit by the materia on the altar. I leaned in to it and entered the darkened hallway behind the altar.

I came into a darkened, empty laboratory. A wall of cold lab equipment greeted me.

"Malaika?" My voice seemed to echo in the emptiness as I called out to her. "Just listen. Please. I didn't realize he was there. He followed me. I didn't bring him here. Honestly. I didn't know about it. Please believe me."

The deafening echoes were my response. The silence of the lab was not broken.

Anger rose up in me, directed not at Malaika, but Cloud. I couldn't believe what had just happened. I'd lost her trust—more simply, I'd lost her—because Cloud felt like following me, because he didn't trust me and what I said to him. They were all hiding from me now like I was some sort of monster.

"What can I do to prove it to you?"

Silence. I let out an irritated sigh and turned to leave.

"Are you telling the truth?"

I stopped and turned. Malaika stood in front of me on the edge of the line of machines. Behind her stood her mother, a pair of white eyes watching from the shadows.

"Of course I am. I wouldn't lie to you."

The lights in the lab turned back on, and the mechanical doors closed behind me.

"Then I believe you. I trust you."

The vigilant eyes disappeared into the machinery.

She said she trusted me and allowed me to stay with her that day, but I felt she was more reserved when she spoke to me. There was an uncomfortable tension between us. But I really couldn't blame her for being reserved. She didn't know Cloud as I did. All she saw was a human I'd brought to her home. But at least she spoke to me. None of the others in the lab would even come close to me, let alone speak with me.

"You know, Cloud is a very good person," I said to Malaika later that day. "There is no need to fear him."

"I'm sure your friend is a fine human, but... I'm not ready yet."

"I understand," I said, and didn't. Of course, I hadn't lived my life separated from the world, so I couldn't truly understand.

I stayed in the uncomfortable environment for most of the rest of the day with Malaika, talking to her. A few times we got on the topic of her missing brother again. I could see clearly that his absence distressed her. We spoke about it, but, as with everything else that day, it was severely strained and very uncomfortable. I now felt as uncomfortable in the lab as I'd felt in Cosmo Canyon.

I couldn't take it, and near the end of the day I left the lab. The family seemed even to breathe a collective sigh of relief as I left. The entrance of the cavern was closed as I came to it, the cavern veiled in darkness. Again the light from the materia was out. Quickly I became accustomed to the darkness and could see. First, I went to the altar and inspected it. The materia still lay in its place, but it appeared to be inactive. I couldn't open the door to the outside. I tried to find the door to see if I could open it manually, but to no avail. I was stuck.

But as I turned, somewhat against my will, to go back into the laboratory, I heard the rumble of moving rocks. Light rushed forth into the cavern and a strong wind was upon me, blowing in from the lake and the waterfall, spraying a mist of water at me. The light shocked me, and I turned, squinting to see.

The scattered light of a sunset glimmered brightly through the rushing waterfall in broken reds and oranges, peering around a large silhouetted figure standing in the doorway. Its shadow stretched across the cavern and engulfed me. An animal with a mane. I could see no detail in the silhouette, but I knew who it was.

A deep voice rose over rush of the falls. "Red XIII. You brought a human here?"

"Not of my own accord," I answered, still squinting to see.

"My mother told me." He said it more for himself than for me.

The wind howled alone for a moment. Bikhai didn't move; he stood across the doorway, barring my exit.

"Bikhai, what do-"

"Red XIII, why are you here? We didn't invite you into our family. We didn't ask you to come to this place. We don't want you here."

"What have I done to make you hate me?"

"You have destroyed our lives and relationships. Red XIII, you and what you stand for are what I hate. You and what you stand for are unneeded and unwanted here. You must leave."

Bikhai walked into the cavern as he spoke, speaking forcefully, with pure animosity. Detail came into his silhouette as he came closer; I could see the fire in his eyes. He finished speaking as he passed me. I watched as he walked back behind the altar and into the dark hallway leading to the lab. Its entrance closed behind him, and the materia on the altar glowed again. The wind had died down, and now all that could be heard was the frantic rush of the waterfall. Quietly, after a moment of watching the wall, trying to think, I turned and left.

4.

For some reason the walk back home seemed longer that time. Perhaps I dreaded returning to the canyon and the people in it, returning to Cloud and humanity and the discomfort I'd felt last time I returned home. Perhaps I dreaded leaving Malaika, leaving Bikhai to spread his poison amidst the family. Perhaps, even, I dreaded the time when I eventually would return to Malaika and face either her acceptance or her hatred.

Night had set itself deeply into the sky by the time I reached the canyon. The village slept. I quietly made my way up to Grandfather's house. It was empty. Cloud must have opted to sleep at the Shildra Inn above the pub. Or maybe he'd left the canyon. But to where?

I spent the night, awake, on the second level of the of the observatory thinking, though precisely about what, I couldn't say. I had the distinct feeling of being trapped, and I couldn't figure out why. Many things came to my mind. I relived the events of that day—like a chain of bad happenings. First, Cloud crept into my mind. He followed me to the lab. I ended up about as mad as I'd ever been at him. I felt badly about snarling at him even though I probably shouldn't have felt so. I really hurt him though. I would have to do something to try to mend our relations. Cloud slipped out and Malaika slipped in. I could see her shocked face as she looked at me talking with Cloud, and I could see her shutting herself off from me in the laboratory. I'd lost her trust, despite what she may have said. I remembered Anand watching me from the shadows, protecting her daughter from me. And Bikhai closed the door. They all portrayed me as a villain now, and had tried to protect themselves from me. They had distanced themselves from me.

The night drifted slowly by, passing me up with ease, and after an eternity and before I realized it, morning arose. My senses, numbed by sleeplessness and fatigue, felt nothing, and even after I saw the weak light of morning filtering in through a window above me I didn't move.

A few more hours passed before I got up to start my day. I rose on unstable, shaky legs and stretched. As I climbed down the ladder to the first floor of the observatory I heard a distant knocking through a fog of air—I was quite a bit more tired than I thought. Sleepily I opened the front door of the house and found myself face to face with Cloud. Unfazed, I looked past him and saw Kero at the top of the ladder leading down to the rest of the village, looking a bit worried.

"Come in," I said, looking at Kero.

Cloud cautiously walked in, and I closed the door behind him.

"Cloud. You stayed," I said flatly. Fatigue gripped me. Suddenly I wanted nothing more than to sleep.

"Yes," he said back in the same manner.

"You slept at the inn then?"

"I stayed at the inn. I didn't sleep well last night."

I smiled dreamily.

"You too?" he asked.

"I'm glad you're here. There's something I want to tell you. About yesterday..." I paused. "I... I didn't mean to lose my temper like that." One of the few times in my life I've had to apologize for any of my actions.

"Red, you don't have anything to apologize for. I should be doing that. I shouldn't have been there."

"What's done is done, I guess. No use going back and trying to change it now. I just felt like I had to say something to you though. It troubled me last night."

Now Cloud smiled faintly.

"So..." I said. "...Now you know, huh?"

"About your friend? I just can't believe it. You were right. About everything. I suppose the rest of her family is real too?"

"You haven't told anyone have you?" I asked.

"Why? Don't you trust this with anybody else in the canyon?"

"I don't think it's a matter of trust, really. At least not for anyone in the canyon."

Maybe I lied, maybe I didn't. The words just came out of my mouth. Maybe it was a lie, maybe it wasn't.

"You said there are more than just the one I saw?"

"You saw Malaika. There are six others: two brothers, one sister, two parents, and a grandfather named Panth, though one of the brothers has gone missing." I didn't feel up to telling him the nature of Malaika's 'family.'

"Hey, I saw those lights again last night, same place as before. I was coming up to see if you'd returned from the mountains and to talk to you, but I decided against it right outside the house. It was then I saw them, off over the mountains, same place as night before last, like I said."

"How long were they there?"

"I only watched them for about twenty minutes. They disappeared for a few minutes after that and then came back. When I returned to the pub they were still there."

A troubled sigh escaped me.

"They are out there," Cloud said. He finally believed me. "When are you leaving?"

"Huh?"

"To see if Malaika is alright. You are going, right?"

I hesitated for a moment. "I... I don't know. I may..." I said foggily.

"How could you not?"

"...I think it would be best if I were to stay away from there, at least for the time being."

"But why?"

"Just to let things... calm down."

"From what?" Cloud already knew the answer. "Me?"

I didn't answer.

"What happened after she saw me?"

"Malaika and her family aren't very trusting of humans. It's no wonder, if you think about it. The only humans most of them remember are the scientists who im-prisoned them."

"Imprisoned them?"

"Inside that mountain we were at yesterday is a scientific laboratory. Malaika and the others were captured and taken there for protection during the GI War. During that time, they had tests performed on them as part of a recovery program for my species by the lab's scientists. Those scientists left after a time, but Malaika and her family didn't. They wanted to stay out of the public eye, away from... well, humanity. They have grown up bearing some animosity toward humans and outsiders to their group in general because of their imprisonment in that laboratory. Seeing you talking to me yesterday sparked some of that animosity, and it spread like wildfire through to the others. They shut themselves off from me because of... my connection to you."

"I'm sorry..."

"It's nothing to be apologetic about. They just don't know you as well as I do."

Cloud seemed to agree and excused himself rather abruptly to go get something to eat, leaving me alone again at the door to Grandfather's house. I, still half-asleep, watched him go, watched him climb down the ladder leading below, and watched the hatch close down on the ladder after him, and then all was quiet. From down below in the village came the soft rustle and clamor of people milling around through their daily routines. A bird flew by, uttering a piercing screech as it passed, and flew off into the distance over the canyon. And again all was quiet.

Most of the rest of the day followed in that same quiet. A cool breeze flew in lazily from the north, keeping the day cooler than normal for that time of the year. I was alone for most of the day, locked up on top of the canyon.

5.

The time rolled by that day, and, as much as I tried not to think about her, Malaika slipped into my thoughts. How could I patch up our relations? She said she'd understood that it wasn't my fault, that I'd been followed without my knowing. Maybe understanding just wasn't enough. I thought again about what Bikhai said to me. What I stand for... What did I stand for?

I left the canyon about midday, not really knowing where to go. For the first time in a few months the leg I'd broken the previous year physically hurt me. The last time it had hurt had preceded by a day a strong storm that swept in over the ocean. The storm lasted for several days, dumping torrential rainfall all across the canyon, even flooding some parts at lower elevations. The Cosmo Candle was nearly put out, and the entire time a piercing pain shot all through my leg. As I limped silently away from the canyon, the storm came to my mind.

I made my way to the ocean—the walking seemed at least to some extent to help my leg—and began to walk along the beach. The sky showed no sign of the storm I felt. A vivid blue stretched out as far as I could see, broken by intermittent puffs of white, to a point where sky and sea melted into one. Waves rolled in and out, bringing new sand to the beach and taking old sand back out to sea, over and over again in a cycle. At every moment the beach was new. I watched with interest as the undertow took its hold on the sand. It was mesmerizing. I don't know how long I walked (time seemed to lose its measure after a while) but I know I walked a great distance. Nothing changed, and so time lost its measure.

And I didn't even notice it at first, probably because my mind wasn't with me. Maybe I thought what I saw walking calmly, plain as day, toward me along the beach was my reflection in the wet sand, or maybe it was a mirage. Maybe it was a dream. In any case, before I could truly realize it, the dream was upon me.

"You were coming to visit us?" the mirage asked me.

I looked away from the ocean and stopped walking. Panth stood before me on the sand.

"No," was my simple reply. It still didn't quite register with whom I talked.

"Are you afraid?"

I didn't answer.

"Of what are you afraid, Nanaki?"

I looked Panth in the eyes. He seemed to be able to look into me, at what I was thinking, at how I felt. I didn't have to say anything; he already knew.

"You know that feeling as well as I do," he said. "To know complete isolation is to know fear intimately. Don't isolate your self from us because of what has happened. Don't be afraid anymore. You will never again be alone." He paused for a moment. "Bikhai has spoken to you?"

"Yes."

"Don't let what he says influence you. He is strong, but both he and what he says are immature. They are driven by fear."

"Of what?"

Only the quiet surging and receding of the ocean tide could be heard.

"My grandson, the only thing he fears is that which he cannot know, what he cannot control. He fears that which has not yet happened."

The tide surged in more powerfully than before, rolling up past me, rolling over my feet; I felt its undertow push and then pull me.

"I wish you would come back. If not for anyone else, then for Malaika. She misses you. She always has."

Always? I'd only met her just recently.

"And bring that human friend of yours along when you come."

"Cloud?"

"Yes. Coming to know humans again may not be so bad an idea. I fear our time living in our home may be coming to a close. Please do bring Cloud with you when you come." With that he turned and began walking away. After a few steps, though, he stopped and faced me again. "It's a frightening thought, not knowing what will come. Looking uncertainty in the face. But the first step is the hardest. The rest will follow." He was finished now, and he turned and padded away as he had come, walking along the beach, a mirage on the sand.

6.

I walked back to the canyon thinking about what to do. Going back to the laboratory so soon? I hadn't planned on it. In fact, I'd planned against it. I'd planned on staying away from there for a week or so to let the shock over my having introduced a human to the environment die down. And now Panth wanted me to run right back and do it again? How could I do that? I'd be risking everything, all the trust that was left, in bringing Cloud back. No, I wouldn't. Not yet.

When I arrived in the canyon, I said nothing to Cloud.

Night fell, and I lay outside watching the lights in the night sky over the mountains. Cloud was in the house in Grandfather's observatory. The telescope probed the sky.

Sleep beckoned constantly to me. It had been nearly 48 hours since I'd last slept. The lights continued as I got up to go inside.

"Cloud," I called up into the observatory once indoors.

"The lights are out again tonight." There was a slight pause, and then I heard Cloud climbing down the ladders to the first floor. "It's become quite a regular occurrence lately, huh?" He appeared at the base of the ladder.

"Yeah..."

"You're still worried?"

"...They want me to come back. And they want you to come with me."

"What?" He didn't believe me at first.

I said it again.

"Why? Why would they want me to come back? I thought they didn't like humans."

"Honestly, it's not all of them who want you back. Only one, the 'father' of the family, you might say, wants it. He seems to think that they won't be able to live in the laboratory much longer and that becoming acquainted with humans may be a good idea."

An air of apprehension had suddenly surrounded Cloud. I could feel it.

"Alright," he said after a moment. "I'll go with you. When are you going back?"

"I don't know. Panth, the one who wants me to bring you back, made it seem pretty urgent. But I don't know if we should go so soon."

"Tell me then when you're ready—" A yawn broke his speech. I yawned too, almost in response to his yawn. "I need to get some sleep."

"Me too."

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Cloud opened the door outside, and I thought for a moment I saw the lights shining in the sky directly behind him. He waved good-bye, I lifted a paw, and he left for the pub. For some reason he wanted to stay at the inn again that night. It didn't bother me as much as it probably should have. Maybe it just didn't matter anymore. I didn't ask him to stay.

I didn't get much sleep that night or the next few days. The lights kept me company during the night. My thoughts were troubled by the matter at hand. So many things had happened in such a short time... It was hard for me to process it all. Such good things had happened recently. And even more recently, those good things had begun to go bad. Could I stop the decay of things? That was was troubled me. What Malaika had said. What Bikhai had said. What Panth had said. There was a connection in all of it. There was something they had said that I hadn't heard, and it bothered me.

Sometime in the early morning of that first night I fell asleep and woke up groggily a few hours later with a soft ray of sunshine on my face. I couldn't decide that day to return to the lab, nor could I the day after, or the day after that. It bothered me.

'Cloud," I asked later that third day, "what do you think about it?" I'd found him in the diner on the level below Grandfather's house.

"What do you mean? About Panth? About going back?"

I nodded.

"I think you should do what you feel needs to be done." He said it without hesitation, like had practiced saying it beforehand, knowing I would ask.

"I can't just walk away now," I said to him, "but I can't see how I could go back either."

"Why?"

I couldn't answer. I didn't know. Maybe that too was part of what bothered me. "I..." I struggled with the words, and the explanation wouldn't come.

"When do you want to go?"

"I don't know. ...Tomorrow, maybe. I need more time to think."

"Red, do what's needed. I'm sure you don't need to think to know what you need to do."

"Yeah. Thanks," I said, and began off.

"I'll be ready tomorrow."

That day I tried to think, but I couldn't get past what they had said to me. I'd already decided to return to the lab, but I wanted to know why I was so anxious about my return.

'Are you telling the truth? Then I believe you. I trust you.'

'Red XIII, you and what you stand for are unneeded and unwanted here. ...We don't want you here.'

'He is strong, but both he and what he says are immature. They are driven by fear. …It's a frightening thought, not knowing what will come.'

I tried to make a connection, and I couldn't. No matter how I looked at what they said, I couldn't connect them all together. I could see that Panth spoke of Bikhai. But Malaika didn't fit into the picture. He hadn't spoken of her. Or maybe that wasn't it. I looked again. Malaika said she believed me. She renewed her trust in me. Panth had done the same in coming to find me. But Bikhai didn't fit now. There was no trust to speak of. It didn't work.

It took me the rest of that day and half the night before I saw it in the right light. I'd been looking at it all wrong. It had never been what they said, but why they said it. I finally understood what I stood for in Bikhai's eyes, and I could see it in everything they said. Sudden relief surged forth, and my dilemma was washed away. I felt much better, almost as though I were lighter. I could sleep now.

I'd been pacing, I realized, along the grounds of the first level of Grandfather's house and had come to a halt directly in front of a window showing the moon and the night sky outside. I dipped into a deep stretch, and a yawn escaped me. Looking around, fatigue again hit me; I'd been putting it off for more and more time now. Grandfather's house was dimly lit, seeming to invite me to sleep, and I was happy finally to oblige. Sleep came easily that night.


	6. Rebirth

Part Six

1.

I awoke early the next morning with a fresh mind. A bird chirped through complete silence outside.

Cloud said he'd be ready today, I thought. And finally I was ready.

I found him in the diner.

"Are you ready to go?"

Cloud looked up from his food at me. "Well, I'm eating right now, but after this... Maybe ten, fifteen minutes?"

"Okay. I'll be in front of the village."

"See you in a bit."

It was still early morning, and the sun shone along the horizon all the way across the canyon, casting long, soft shadows on the ground. It already was warming up. Today would be a hot one. A warm breeze blew in from out over the ocean, perforating the air with the scent of saltwater. I thought ahead as I waited. I knew what I wanted to say now, and I knew how to say it. I won't deny that some of the aspects of what I was about to do were intimidating, but I felt I could do it. I found myself having difficulty holding still. The anticipation kept me moving.

Thankfully, Cloud came down sooner than he'd said, and we were off without too much delay.

"So how do you think we'll do today?" Cloud asked as we reached the mountains and started climbing.

"I think we're all ready for what's going to happen."

"What's going to happen?"

"Whatever. I don't know. But I think they're ready. I know I am. That's why I'm going back."

"You think something bad is going to happen?"

"Like I said, I don't know. But I'm prepared for whatever may happen."

We seemed to be saying the same thing over and over. Our conversation had stalled. The climb seemed to go slowly, dragging along meagerly at close to a snail's pace. I tried to remember all I'd thought about, trying to get it all in the front of my mind for use at a moment's notice, but anticipation and anxiety clouded my thoughts. My mind wasn't climbing with me, wasn't talking with Cloud, and it wasn't in the previous night's passage; it was already ahead of me, in the cavern and the laboratory, trying to see the day's events pass before they happened.

The next I remembered, Cloud and I had reached the top of the mountains and were looking down on the lake below. Immediately, I noticed that things were different from the last time I'd been there. The waterfall had dried up, it looked like, and the entrance to the cavern was exposed to the day.

"That's weird," I said to myself.

"What is?"

"The waterfall. It's gone."

"Not supposed to be?"

"Come on. Let's go." I descended into the crater, Cloud following behind.

Things inside the cavern had changed as well. It was fairly dark. Rocks and rubble were lying around the place, broken and irregular. Many of the blue pyramid formations had been broken and were missing their tops.

"What happened in here?" I asked in shock.

I saw the altar. Several of its wings had been broken off, some snapped at their bases, some chipped about halfway down, some cracked down the middle. The white materia was missing. A deep, ragged crack ran in the ground from the base of the altar, between Cloud and me, and past us outside to the lake.

"Red." Cloud had walked behind the altar.

I walked to his spot and saw the crack running from behind the altar back into the dark hallway leading to the laboratory.

We followed the crack straight down the hallway, passing more rubble and some small rocks, and came to the threshold of the lab. Only one of the huge mechanized doors still stood its frame. It looked like it had been hit by a very large object—it had been crushed out of shape and bent inward toward the lab. The other door lay crumpled on the ground fifteen feet inside the doorway.

Cloud took the first step across the threshold. He was awed by the laboratory. I was shocked by what had happened to it. My thoughts escaped me. I wandered over to the crumpled door in front of me.

At its top and bottom ends the door bent up to the sky; the rest of it was bent and bashed almost beyond recognition. I made out a sign on a less battered section of the door:

Shin-Ra Electric Company

Cleaning the World with Mako Energy

This lab had been run on mako. Still was, maybe. I'd thought mako had gone out of use a long time prior, gone the way of Shin-Ra, but apparently I was wrong.

Cloud stood beside me, reading as well. The lab's use of mako energy didn't seem as shocking to him as it was to me.

"Powerful stuff," he said matter-of-factly.

What did that mean?

"Nanaki," I heard, and looked up. Malaika and Anand walked toward me. Anand had called my name.

Cloud tensed up next to me. Malaika and Anand seemed not to notice Cloud, or else they ignored him.

"I'm glad you came," she called out again.

They were upon me quickly, and Cloud continued to go more or less unnoticed.

"Panth will be glad to see that you have come," she said somewhat privately.

"He's been waiting for you," Malaika followed. "For the past few days, actually. He's seemed preoccupied."

"Something is really bothering him."

"What happened to these doors?" I asked.

They shot a glance at Cloud.

Anand spoke. "I think whatever did this is what Panth is worried about."

Malaika still watched Cloud out of the corner of her eyes. "I'll take you and your friend to see him." She turned and motioned for us to follow her.

Malaika, Cloud, and I walked back through the lab. Anand did not follow. All eyes were on us, mostly on Cloud, as we passed the others. Daya watched him with suspicion. Chatur watched him with a strange interest. And Bikhai scowled and glared, but at me, as he sat alone in a dark corner of the lab.

Malaika saw Bikhai's scowl and said to me in a whisper "I think he thinks you're trying to take me away."

Other than that statement, we walked without speaking; she looked almost afraid to say anything in front of Cloud. After walking what felt like several miles through a sea of eyes, Panth finally came into sight.

"Ah, Nanaki, you have come." A sleepy smile drifted onto his face. "And you've brought your friend."

I looked over at Cloud. He stood partly behind me, seeming at every second to shrink farther and farther away. "Cloud," I said to Panth, giving my friend a name, and side stepped quickly so Panth could see him.

"Nice to meet you, Cloud."

Cloud bowed his head slightly. "I'm glad to meet you as well." He attempted feebly to step back behind me.

"I had begun to wonder if you would come," Panth said, turning his attention back to me. "But you're here now, and from the look of things, you've come just in time."

"I saw all of the damage. What happened?" I asked.

"No one is sure." A male voice said from behind me. Chatur came up from behind and passed me on my right. "All we know is that it happened last night and early this morning," he said as he walked to Panth's side. I saw the tattooed IV on his shoulder.

He continued speaking. "I saw strange lights in the lab early this morning. The lab's lights were out at the time—we turn them off while we sleep. I saw these green lights shining from behind the machines near the entrance. Crashes and sounds of twisting metal and heavy footsteps came from the direction of those lights. My mind was hazy from sleep, and I thought at first that Erevu had returned. I even thought I heard him call out to me. But quickly I realized it wasn't him, and I was frightened. I stood and watched the lights move about beyond the machines for about five minutes, listening to the crashing sounds and the footsteps, and then suddenly they disappeared. In the dark I couldn't move. Just after sunrise, I went to investigate. You've seen everything I've seen."

"Yes," I said, "but you don't know what did this?"

Panth spoke up. "No, It was, however, something most definitely large, and very powerful. And it has left us exposed. You saw the materia is missing?"

I nodded.

"This creature that came into our lab took the materia on the altar, locking the entrance to our lab open. I hate to admit it, but none of us except Erevu knows how to work any of these machines around here beyond turning the lights on and off, so we don't know how to fix this problem. We are exposed to the outside world right now."

"And Erevu hasn't been returned yet," came Cloud's voice from behind me.

The conversation halted abruptly, and three pairs of eyes burned past me into Cloud. I heard Cloud's breath cut off, and he was completely still. For a moment I thought they'd killed him with nothing but their looks.

"No." Panth broke the uneasy silence.

A soft exhale as the tension died down.

Panth paused and then said again, "No," and stopped. "But I have this feeling... Erevu can be found if the source of these lights can be found."

"Cloud and I have seen the same lights Chatur saw from Cosmo Canyon every night for the past week. They're always in the same area: right around these mountains. In fact, the first night we saw them was the night Erevu disappeared."

"So whatever this is may come back tonight then," Malaika proposed.

"I'd say so," I agreed.

Another lull in the conversation ensued, but the tension was not there.

"...Tonight the lights will return, you think," said Panth after thinking for a moment. "If we were to hide up in the mountains, we could at least see what is causing them."

"See what we're up against," Chatur repeated.

"You think this creature is against us?" I asked.

"I think if it took Erevu, it can't be a friend of ours," he replied.

I wondered to myself, Do we know it took Erevu? But I didn't say anything.

"Nanaki," asked Panth, "would you go tonight into the mountains and wait with us?"

I nodded.

"And you, Cloud?"

Once again, all eyes were on Cloud, this time, my own included.

Cloud was taken aback by the request, but he stepped from behind me and answered with surprising quickness. "Yeah. Yes, I'll go."

"I don't believe I'll be able to go myself," Panth stated. "I'll ask Bikhai to go in my place. I'll go ask now." He left, and Chatur followed, leaving Cloud and me alone with Malaika.

"You'll be coming tonight, right?" I asked her.

"I don't think Grandfather will want me to, but I'm going to come." She looked at Cloud, who was behind me again. "Cloud, my name is Malaika. My grandfather told me to try to get to know you."

Cloud bowed his head slightly again, but he said nothing.

I spoke instead. "Cloud lived in Costa del Sol on the coast east of here until about a week ago. He came to Cosmo Canyon after the people in his town disappeared one night."

"Like Erevu's disappearance, it seems," Cloud said.

Malaika looked at him for a moment with interest, the same kind of look I'd seen on Chatur's face earlier, and then back at me as though to ask why Cloud had spoken.

I continued. "I've been close to Cloud's family for almost my entire life. He comes from a long line of very good people. Good friends. And he is no different."

"I'm sure I'll be glad to have met you, but if you'll excuse me, I need to go find my brother," she said. I could tell she was afraid. She moved off in the direction Panth had gone.

"Cloud, wait here," I said. "I'll be right back." I left him behind and went to catch up to Malaika, reaching her a moment later. "I told the truth back there. You don't need to be afraid of Cloud."

"I told the truth also. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I'm quite sure that your friend is good, and I'm sure that once I get to know him..." She trailed away. "But at the moment, he's just a human. I can't take this kind of change to my life yet. Not yet."

I could sense Bikhai's words behind her voice. "Malaika," I said, "things are changing, whether or not you want them to." I came off sounding annoyed. "There isn't any sort of choice for you to make." I wanted to stop speaking, but the words kept coming. "Your brother is gone. Your home won't last. You can't stay sheltered forever." I stopped walking. "There are some truths to face, Malaika. You'll be lost if you try to stay behind. You'll be lost."

She kept walking. "I need to find my brother," she said again over her shoulder. "I'll see you tonight."

I sat down in my spot. I could sense Cloud's words behind my voice. There are some truths to face. He'd said that to me before. And the reaction was almost the same.

Cloud walked up behind me. "What'd you say?"

"Nothing," I said, and looked up at him. "Nothing worth repeating anyway."

2.

Cloud stayed behind me for most of the rest of the day, and because he stayed behind me, Malaika's family stayed away from me. He had become a burden on me. But at one point around midday near the double mechanical doors, Panth came and took him away for a while.

Almost immediately, I was approached by Anand. She looked into me with those two white eyes. "I can see your intentions, Nanaki, in saying what you said to Malaika."

"You heard? You were there too?"

"By chance, I happened to hear."

"I..."

"I think you were right about what you said. It's hard to take, but it's true, and these broken doors prove it. I can see it. But Malaika... She has lived her entire life within these walls. She doesn't know anything else. You can understand; this place is her home, and losing it frightens her."

"I do. I realized that."

"It scares us all to some extent. As I've said, even Panth shows signs of nervousness and unrest these days. All I'm trying to say is... give her some time."

"Right," I said. "You know, I regretted saying it almost immediately."

"There is nothing to regret in what you said." Her eyes seemed almost to smile. "Just how you said it. Be safe tonight, and keep her safe."

"Thanks. I will."

She walked through the double-doorway and into the hallway beyond. The mechanical door still lay crumpled on the floor in front of me. Be safe, I thought. After a moment, I followed Anand outside.

The day had turned out to be quite hot, just as I'd thought it would. The sky was cloudless and blue, and the sun radiated its light brightly.

On the other side of the lake near the river, Panth was talking with Cloud, Anand listening in from nearby. I could hear them talking, but not well enough to make out any words.

As the inarticulate sounds floated across the lake, I came up to the water's edge and peered down into it. My reflection, wavering left and right, inward and outward, looked back up at me. The water held no blues or greens; It was pure black, even in the bright sunlight. The ghost of blacks and grays convulsed and laughed back at me.

"I see you." And it saw me too.

"Who are you talking to?" a voice from beside me asked. Cloud's image stood beside mine in the water and had joined in the laughter.

"Nobody. ...It's strange. The water in this lake isn't refracting any light."

"Just eating it right up. I wonder if it's always like this."

"I don't remember. The only other time I really looked at it was in the middle of the night."

Cloud picked up a fairly large rock and threw it a foot into the the lake. The water rippled violently upon impact, and the ghosts broke up and dissipated momentarily. Panth was talking quietly with Anand now.

"What did Panth want?" I asked.

"Just to know more about me. Looks like you were right. He seems to be the only one who wants me here."

"Are you scared?"

"What?" He didn't understand.

"Of them. Are you afraid?"

"A little intimidated, I guess."

"It's the same with them. They'll get used to you eventually." I said it as much to him as to myself. "Maybe soon—as soon as a week, or maybe even tonight— or maybe a long time from now." Anand's words echoed through my head. "Don't be nervous or intimidated. Just give them some time."

Cloud was silent for a moment. He was putting words together in his head, wondering how to say them. After a moment, he spoke. "Red, do you remember when you broke your leg falling over that cliff?"

"How could I ever forget?" I answered.

"Over those next few days after I brought you back when you were slipping in and out of consciousness and saying those strange things..."

"Yeah?"

"You said..." His mind reached back. "You asked me if I saw the angel. You said she saved you. A white angel. Over and over again. I thought it must have been your injuries talking."

I didn't remember any of it. "A white angel saved me, huh? Maybe it was the injuries, or maybe not. I don't know. I can't remember. But maybe I was saved. Maybe it's true."

"Maybe."

3.

Night fell, and I found myself waiting on the mountainside with Cloud, Chatur, Bikhai, and Malaika, wondering how I'd gotten there. When had the sun gone down? When had the day passed by? I lay crouched down, watching and wondering.

All else was silent. No one spoke; perhaps they were afraid to. My heart beat quickly and heavily in my chest, and I could hear its pulse in my ear. I didn't know why I was so nervous. I even shook slightly. Was I nervous? Maybe excited. Maybe not. I tried to keep still and to stay quiet. I concentrated on my pulse, and tried to slow it down. It was all I heard.

"Are you okay?" Suddenly the silence was broken.

"Huh?" I lost my concentration. It was Malaika.

"You're shaking."

"Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I don't know why I'm shaking..."

"Are you nervous? Scared?" Was she poking at me?

My leg ached, I realized, all up and down its length. I wanted to shake it and stretch it out, but I didn't. "Maybe a little."

"Me too. I think we all are," she said

Bikhai glared over his shoulder at me.

She spoke uncomfortably. "I want to apologize about today."

"Me too," I said.

"It took me some time and some advice from Grandfather, but I realized you were right. It's hard to accept, but... I guess that's the truth for you, huh?" She let out a gasping laugh, but it was half-hearted.

"Anand spoke to me today, and she helped me come to a realization. I knew that you've lived most all of your life here in the lab, but I guess I never realized what kind of impact it has had on you. You haven't seen the world for yourself, have you?"

She shook her head.

"I didn't mean to push it on you. I didn't mean to try to push you out of your home."

"It was the truth. I just couldn't understand it. And... I didn't want to." Another half-hearted laugh. "We all have to wake up to reality eventually, don't we?"

"You don't think we'll find Erevu?"

Another glare. Malaika seemed not to have heard me.

"Nanaki... Will you be there? If we leave here?"

"Definitely. I'll be anywhere you need me."

"You'll show me the world? Teach me what I don't understand?"

"I'll do it as long as you'll allow." The pain in my leg subsided. "I'll show you anything, everything, you want to see."

Bikhai rose forcefully to his feet with a grunt and walked down a ways from us .

I watched him go. "And I'll protect you from what you don't."

"Thanks," she said, and was done.

"How far from here have you been?"

"Remember when you chased me from Cosmo Canyon up here into the mountains? That's as far from home as I've ever been. In fact, I'd only ever been out that far once before, and I saw you then too. You fell from the sky to me." She smiled. "But your landing was a bit off. You hurt yourself pretty badly. I remember I didn't know what to do when you fell in front of me. I had come to be alone—it was shortly after my grandmother died—and suddenly you were there. I was scared just being that far from home, and you scared me even more, but... something kept me there with you. I could tell just by looking at you and listening to the sounds you made that you were hurt, and I saw your house far up above. I wanted to try to get someone's attention to help you, so I stood by you and howled, hoping someone in your house would hear. Lights inside turned on, and I ran away, feeling that now you would get your help."

"It was you? You were the one who howled?"

"You remember that. You remember me?"

"No. Not clearly. Cloud—that was who you woke with your howls—told me about it later."

Malaika looked over at Cloud, who had been listening in from the beginning of the conversation, and Cloud looked back at her. He leaned back against a large boulder and seemed oddly at peace. A white fire burned gently behind Malaika.

"Cloud thought it was I who was howling. I didn't remember it."

"I was wrong," he said, and smiled faintly at having said it.

Why did he smile, I wondered.

Malaika looked at him with wonder, and the fear was gone. "Maybe I've been wrong too. Maybe it won't be so bad..."

"You three," Chatur broke in. He had been keeping watch while we talked. "Come look. Something is happening."

Malaika and I, along with Cloud, came up beside Chatur. Bikhai remained by himself separated from the four of us. He had noticed something as well. We crouched around Chatur and looked out over the lake.

Everything seemed calm at first. A false alarm? "What? I don't see any" I was interrupted; a beam of green light suddenly shot up into the air from the lake's surface and rolled left and right momentarily, like a spotlight searching the sky, before disappearing below water again.

"What was that?" Malaika asked.

"The lights," I said to no one.

Again the green beam of light rose up from the depths of the lake, this time accompanied by another beam seeming to emanate from the same source underwater. The lake water began to agitate, forming small ripples, and quickly the ripples gave way to splashing waves. More and more lights emerged and searched the sky. Quickly the lake turned into a tumultuous quagmire, and the area was lit by the near-ubiquitous green light. A light green mist rose up from the water and became so thick that it was like fog, shielding the lake's surface from view.

As the shafts of light shone up from below on and across us on the mountainside, the pain in my leg resurfaced and climbed into my hip and the small of my back. I had tensed my body involuntarily, but I still shook spasmodically.

And then the water stopped raging, and out from the green mist on the lake stepped a familiar figure.

"Erevu?" asked Malaika loudly.

The area was strangely aglow in the light green aura of the lights. Erevu stood facing away from the lake, still as death. The beams of light seemed to emanate from Erevu and radiate around him in every direction. The water behind him slowly resettled, and the green fog began to lift.

"Erevu..." Chatur whispered next to me.

None of us moved. Was it truly Erevu? Had he returned? We all watched and inspected him as he began walking lifelessly forward, as though he were asleep, toward the cavern. It looked to be him. Everything from the tattoos to the fire on his tail looked the same. But how could he have walked out of the lake? The water would have killed him. I looked closer. Something was wrong.

Bikhai snuck quietly over to the four of us. "Is it really him?" he asked Chatur.

"No," I answered, and I found what I was looking for. "Look at the eyes."

Erevu stopped walking and stood, as still as before, facing the cavern. Entirely red eyes. He tilted his head down toward the ground, and glared out of the corner of his eyes directly at us.

Cloud's words from a few days earlier came back to me. 'You were right. About everything.'

As soon as the words came to me, the five of us were illuminated in the beam of one of the lights, blinding us with its brightness. The other searchlights disappeared. Erevu lifted a front leg, and pointed it languidly at us. The shaft of light narrowed to include only Cloud, who I could vaguely see was now standing behind me near the rocky wall.

I looked back down at Erevu. His leg was still in the air, pointed at us. His face remained emotionless; only his eyes, glowing red in the night, glinted menacingly behind the green light. Then, without warning, he, as did the shaft of light, disappeared from our sight. The area remained cast in green.

Fear and dread struck me a split-second before I heard the cry from behind. I wheeled around and came face to face with Erevu. He stood where Cloud had been, glaring coldly at me. Cloud was nowhere in sight. I couldn't move at first and stared him blankly in the face. Then my sight traced slowly down to his still-raised leg. It was covered, almost up to the elbow, in blood. A drop fell from his paw and hit in the middle of a small puddle, black in the night, forming just in front of him.

Cloud...

Erevu glared at me for a moment, and then at Malaika, and then Bikhai, and Chatur, inspecting us. Horror came into me. Erevu's sight came back to me, and his face held the same cold-blooded expression. Another drop fell into the puddle, and he disappeared again, reappearing below, where he had stood before. He began again to walk toward the cavern, leaving one red footprint on the rocks every few feet behind. Darkness returned to the area as the green light receded into the cavern with Erevu.

"Cloud?" I asked, dumbfounded, through the darkness. My sight wouldn't adjust to the dark. "Cloud?" My voice became more frantic as a thick fog descended upon me.

From somewhere to my right I heard Chatur say "We must find Panth and the others and get them out of there before they are found," or something to that effect; I barely heard it through the fog.

"Cloud? Cloud?" I began calling out, louder and louder, as panic and fear came and gripped me. I was grasping through the dark, but I realize now it was not for him. "Cloud?" I grasped for what he was. The call rang out and went invariably unanswered.

Three small lights, two orange and one white, strode off into the darkness.

"Don't go. Not yet," I said and followed the lights. I didn't understand what I was saying. I didn't understand what I was thinking. Suddenly, I found myself alone. Through the darkness and the fog I found my way to the lake and stopped and looked in. "There you are," I whispered. Immediately, the panic was gone.

The water had stilled itself into a calm, glassy plain. The ghost stared up at me from the from the depths, palely lit by the light of my tail.

"I see you."

A few moments passed. I could still hear my pulse in my ear, and my leg still hurt me, but I calmed down. I looked at the ghost, and it looked at me. The laughing had stopped. A thunderous crash came from behind me in the cavern, and then a rush of footsteps came in my direction. I didn't move. They slowed up and stopped.

"I guess I have to say goodbye," I said to myself.

They stood behind me for a moment, seeming almost afraid to move or speak. Then a face and body appeared next to me on my left in the water. Bikhai. I lifted my head about halfway to him, staring blankly into the lake. The night was silent.

"Maybe now you can understand how I felt," he whispered into my ear.

I looked into the water. Some color had come into my reflection, brought to it by the light of his tail.

"Yeah..." I thought I did.

In the water a third shape appeared next to me on my right. Malaika. I blinked and saw more color come into my reflection.

"The lab's gone. Our home is gone."

"Yeah..." What would I do?

Panth appeared beside Malaika. I remembered the day before on the beach, and I pictured what he had said to me. It seemed he knew what would happen. My reflection had become a near-mirror image now. Slowly the darkness seemed to disappear and my senses to return. Two white eyes materialized on the other side of Bikhai in the lake and looked up at me, watching me, almost smiling. Chatur appeared past those eyes and looked at me with a strange interest. And farther off another shape appeared, not as distinguishable or formed, but present nonetheless. The darkness lifted and was gone.

I don't know how long the seven of us stood there—it seemed to me an eternity at the time—or even when we left the lake and the laboratory and our pasts behind. We were walking away in silence before I knew it.

Words kept echoing through my head as we climbed out of the crater. 'Someday you'll find your life's mate. If we leave, will you be there?' The sky in the east began to brighten and the stars to disappear as we started down out of the mountains—the night was almost over. 'We don't want you here. He thinks you're trying to take me away. My brother is missing. I guess I'll have to watch out for your monster. Cloud... Maybe now you can understand...' The canyon, pale in the weak light of morning, lay ahead, past the river. We walked silently onward. 'It's attracted to sources of mako. Cleaning the world... Several travelers have gone missing.' Everything came together in my mind. The seven of us stood together now in front of the steps leading upward. How did they feel? 'It's a frightening thought, not knowing what will come. You know that feeling. But the first step is the hardest. Don't be afraid anymore. The rest will follow.' I stepped forward. The sun broke over the mountains, and we ascended the steps into the new day.

4.

I suppose that is as good a place to stop as any. It's hard really to pick anywhere to stop telling my story without it seeming horribly abrupt because, even today, my story is not complete. But that's how it was: abrupt. It felt wrong, what happened that night. Like it shouldn't have happened yet. It left me feeling unprepared. I wasn't prepared to lose Cloud, in the same way, I'm sure, that they weren't prepared to lose their home. But that's how it was, and so it was sudden, bringing them to the canyon.

They had a hard time during the first few weeks, especially Malaika and her siblings, who had no remembrance of ever living with humans. It seemed eyes were always pointed in their direction. Understandably, they wanted to stay out of the spotlight and spent most of their time with me in Grandfather's house. Gradually things changed, and it got better as they became more and more accustomed to the humans and the humans became more and more accustomed to them.

Eventually it was like they had always lived in the canyon. I kept my promise to Malaika. I stayed near her always, helped ease her fear, showed her what there was to see in the canyon, and we grew close to each other. Bikhai didn't show the same malcontent at my being near as he did before. Maybe it was because we were in my territory now. Maybe he'd come to accept me. I wouldn't say we ever became friends, but within that first year, we ceased to be enemies.

I myself was in shock for the first weeks after losing Cloud. The full impact of his apparent death had failed to hit me that night. When we returned to the canyon, it was all I could think about for a time. I wished things between us had come to something of a close, but... as I've said, that's not how it always works out. The world waits for no one.

Malaika and I went back to the lake several times to look for Cloud, but we found nothing. I saw inside the cavern that the hallway leading back to the lab had collapsed in on itself. Malaika told me later that Erevu had brought it down that night. She said she saw him as she went with Chatur and Bikhai back into the lab to find the others, that the lab was lit only by the green rays of light. She said he just stood there and watched as they ran by, just watched them run away out of the lab, almost like he was waiting. It seemed to her that no sooner had they gotten into the cavern than the lab collapsed. She thought he had waited for them to leave.

Neither Erevu, nor the monster appeared again after that night. I have wondered many times over the years for what purpose the monster existed and have come to the conclusion that there is no way to know that reason for certain. I do have my theories, though. I think maybe what I have already said holds the truth to this question. The monster's existence may have stretched back to the days of Midgar, Meteor, and Holy. I've wondered, was humanity destined to disappear? Or maybe only a part of it? Long ago, the Weapons roamed the planet, produced because of the use and abuse of Mako energy, produced specifically to protect the planet from that abuse and those who caused it. It has occurred to me that Cloud and Erevu may have been victims of the planet. It was only taking back what it had lost.

After those first few weeks, I guess I began to move on. It was hard, but it had to happen eventually. With Malaika by my side, I was living a new life. I began to look more toward the future. Toward the unknown. Toward life with a family. I realized I didn't have to be alone anymore. It seemed the old life, my solitude, my fear, had died with Cloud.

Today, things are different. No longer are we all together in Cosmo Canyon. In fact, Malaika and I are the only two of the original seven remaining in the canyon. Panth is gone; it's been almost a hundred years now. His age caught up with him, and he fell asleep one night and didn't wake up. Anand died a few years back. I was the one who found her. She, too, had gone overnight. Her eyes were open when I found her, still watching me. The image was burned into my mind. I'll never forget those eyes.

Chatur, without Anand, heads his clan on the Eastern Continent. He is well advanced in years and barely hangs on these days. He doesn't seem to care anymore whether he lives or dies, greeting whatever may come, day by day. His flare has gone. I hope to get across the ocean to see him soon. It doesn't seem there is much time left for him. Bikhai and Daya left the canyon a long time ago and moved across the Nibel Mountains to start their own clan. Bikhai never really did get used to the canyon. Humanity was too much for him, so he left it and took Daya with him.

As for me, life has settled down into a rhythm. Things are peaceful and relatively uneventful here in the canyon. It's been an eternity living like this, it seems. For more than 200 years my life has been static. Perhaps it's as I have said, that there are more important matters in the world to worry about. Maybe I've been pushed to the side now, put out of the spotlight, but I'm happy living like this. I'm happy finally to be at a point in my life that I can be happy with. I'm happy finally not to be alone. But even in this time of peace there is a feeling of uneasy apprehension in me. I know that one day, somehow or another, this blissful eternity will come to a close. I know that I can't go on forever. I have lived a full life, fuller than I ever could have wanted. I wait for that day in hopes that it will never come, but I know that when it does come, I will be ready.

For now, though, I've just got to continue living every day as it comes, to keep moving, because that's all I can do. I know that if I stop, I'll be passed up, and I'll find myself suddenly with nowhere to go, with nothing I can do, and I will be lost. It's easy, I've seen, to get lost and never find your way. So, I will keep moving, for Malaika, for my family, for my species, and for myself, until that future day comes when this paradise comes to its end.

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And so ends my story. I could have dragged it out another three or four chapters, but I don't think I would have been able to add much to what is already there. I had fun writing the story, and I hope you had at least a little fun reading it. Before I go I'd like to thank all of you who have been reading for the past weeks and any who come across this page in the future for taking the time to read what I've written. Also, special thanks go out to Cendrillo for all the reviews of my past chapters. I really appreciate the feedback. Thanks.


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